You Just Can't Make This Stuff Up

I've got mad skills!

2010-12-07T10:13:00.000-05:00

Do you ever have those moments where it feels like whatever you’re thinking actually changes the physical world? I mean, this weekend I was doing laundry and was packing up my clean clothes in my hamper. As I was doing that, I thought, “wow, this hamper is OLD! I can’t believe it’s lasted this long! I got it my freshman year of college – 1999 – and it’s still as good as new. I can’t believe it hasn’t broken.” As soon as the thought left my mind, the hamper broke. Just like that. I had just finished silently praising it for its 11 years of steadfast service…and it gave up. Maybe the thought was a premonition, an omen of things to come? Maybe I accidently vexed the hamper? Or maybe it was just a coincidence (or not…) Just saying...

Crows are weird...so are people...

2010-12-01T18:17:00.000-05:00

Yesterday morning as I was leaving Starbucks, I noticed a group of crows just chilling on the roof of my car. There must have been six or seven of them just sitting there. Immediately my mind went crazy: what does having six crows sitting on your car mean? Are they a sign? What do crows symbolize? Why are they only sitting on my car, no one else’s?

Now, have you even seen a crow up close? I don’t know if these birds were of typical size, but they were huge! I mean, the size of cats! Of course I was scared of them, because along with thinking about what they meant, I was thinking about Hitchcock’s “The Birds.” They might want to eat my eyes! So I didn’t walk over to my car immediately and made a mental note to stop watching scary movies. And I decided to yell at them. I started yelling “shoo!” and “get out of here!” but they didn’t move. Then I realized that not only do they possibly have some weird meaning, they’re also bigger than my roommate’s dog AND they’re completely fearless. They just sat there, looking at me, following my movements. Then I thought of Poe’s “The Raven”, specifically the line “the fowl whose fiery eyes now burned into my bosom’s core.” Then I decided I read too much.

So I started flailing my arms and yelling louder (because, even though I know I have an overactive imagination, I wasn’t about to approach my car.) Some man in the parking lot took pity on me when seeing my situation and helped me shoo them away. He was brave and went right up to the car! All but one of the beasts flew away. But one just sat there, which made me want to name him Nevermore. “And the raven never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting…” The man – now only inches away from the bird – told me to go ahead and get in my car and start it up. I did, under his watchful eye, and the bird finally flew away. I thanked the man and drove off.

Just a minute or two later as I was sitting at a red light reflecting on the crows, I happened to look at the car next to me in the other lane. It was the same man – the bird hero. And his window was down, and he was beckoning me to roll mine down, too. But I just smiled and gave him a polite wave. He cheesed back and wiggled his fingers in a silly wave. Then he winked at me. SERIOUSLY?

Kinda like a sunburn, but totally weirder

2010-08-31T23:53:00.000-04:00

Ok, so this post was going to be called, "I can feel my blood", but I decided that'd be too scary for my unsuspecting readers, so I picked a tamer title :) But what happened to me today was totally not what I would call "tame."

Since the fall semester started, I haven't been getting as much sleep at night as I should. So, needless to say, I've been pretty tired. Today it just got to be too much and I needed some serious help. Yesterday a friend of mine was singing the praises of those little energy shot drinks, claiming that they were the only reason he made it through last semester. So I figured I'd try one.

I went to the bookstore on campus hoping to find that "5 Hour Energy" I see everywhere, but the only kind they had was this. I figured it was pretty much the same thing and went ahead and bought it. Once I got through the insanely long line, I ripped this guy open and chugged it on my way to my next class. I had about 10 minutes before I had to be there, so I sat outside in the hall and waited quietly. But as soon as I got comfortable, my neck started to tingle. As in, it got really hot and started to kind of burn. The weirdest part was that the burning hot feeling followed my jugular veins. And as soon as I thought, "why is my jugular on fire?" my face started getting hot. Like, burning hot. Then my whole neck. Then my scalp. I felt like I had gotten an instant sunburn! I had a couple minutes before class, so I ran to the bathroom hoping it felt worse than it looked.

I was wrong. It looked just as bad as it felt.

Remember, if you will, the last time you got a really bad sunburn. If you've never had a sunburn, lucky you! You can go ahead and use this guy as a visual sample. This is what I saw when I looked in the bathroom mirror this afternoon (except I wasn't a guy, and I wasn't making that face) But I was that red! OH MY GOSH! I was really burning up. I took off my little cardigan and saw that the redness was spreading down my chest and over my shoulders. Literally, with every heart beat I could feel the fire pulsate throughout my body. It started down my arms, and soon it hurt to move because my skin felt exactly like it looked: IT BURNED! As the redness (no joke, it was really as red as that guy!) spread, I could feel it: I could feel the exact path it took through my veins, down my midsection, as it spread out to my legs, around my knees and down my shins. It was like I could feel the blood running through my veins because my blood was ON FIRE!

I had no choice but to head back to the classroom because I class was getting ready to start. I saw the other interpreter and she said, "wow, have you just come in from running outside? No? Did you get a sunburn since yesterday? No? My God, what happened to you?" I asked her to touch my arm to see if it really felt as hot as I thought it did: it did. I was not only a freakish color of red, but I was radiating heat. I told her about the energy shot, and she got really nervous. She thought I was having an allergic reaction to it and needed to go to the hospital. I told her I felt fine, other than that whole burning-like-I've-been-lit-on-fire sensation. I mean, I could breathe just fine and my heart was beating just as it was before I drank the shot.

I went ahead and started interpreting class. The other interpreter watched in awe as the burning redness spread down my legs. It was pretty weird. After about 30 minutes since this whole thing started, my neck started to feel cooler. It stopped burning. Then my face, my chest, my shoulders and arms. Soon, my belly and legs were back to normal. All in all, it took about 45 minutes for whatever was in that crazy drink to burn itself out of my system.

The worst part was that it didn't even wake me up. I mean, sure, there was the adrenaline rush of when I looked at my burning arms and exclaimed, "I can feel my blood! It's on fire!" But after that wore off, I was as tired as I was before the drink. My energy-shot-loving co-worker was flabbergasted: he'd never seen anything like it. I complained to him about its complete ineffectiveness and super-weird side effects. "But then again", he reminded me, "they never actually said *how* they'd wake you up. Maybe their method is energizing you with pure fear."

Maybe!

No worries, I'm fine now. But I'm sticking to coffee from here on out!

The 3rd and 4th of July

2010-07-07T23:00:00.000-04:00

Here's my latest adventure :)

So, every year, folks from my church get together and head out on the 3rd of July to the dress rehearsal of "A Capitol 4th". This is a concert of sorts that takes place on the front lawn of the Capitol building here in DC. Each year, it attracts thousands of folks, which is why we go on the 3rd instead of the 4th. The show is exactly the same, but there are far fewer people!

We had folks show up at 3:00 to reserve spots on the lawn. The show doesn't start til 8:00, and even though there are far fewer people than the 4th, it still gets crowded. We staked out several picnic blanket sized patches of ground (even one in the shade!) and played cards, ate snacks and gabbed til the show started. My friend June brought her two girls, ages 4 and 3, so they kept me entertained :)

The show this year was hosted by Jimmy Smits (you know, from the West Wing?) He did a great job, and was fun to watch. We were actually seated about 30 feet in front of where he was standing to do his MC thing. So, we got a real good view of him. Well, the second performer of the night was the lead singer from Hootie and the Blowfish. He got up and sang "God Bless America". We all stood for the song. June stood up and was so moved by the song she started to sign it. Sometimes singing just isn't enough, and signing makes it more...meaningful. Well, she started signing it, and I stood behind her holding her ridiculously cute daughter.

Jimmy Smits saw her signing and motioned to the camera guy to start filming her. She was on the big screen (for the whole crowd to see!) for the whole song! I didn't know it, but I was also in the background! After it was over, June opened her eyes and Jimmy was staring right at her. He gestured to her that she should come back the next day, the 4th, for the actual concert so she can sign the song again. Again, he did this in front of the whole crowd, so everybody got to see Jimmy talking to her. She was shy and didn't respond right away, but those of us standing behind her made sure to tell him that she'd be back :)

Well, you need tickets to the 4th. And the night of the 3rd, they'd be almost impossible to come by. But, before the night was over, Jimmy send a security person over to get June's email so they could send her some tickets. The next morning she got the email that she and a guest were personally welcomed back by Jimmy Smits himself to sit in the VIP section of the show. So guess who got to be her "guest"? That's right, ME!

Well, we got to the show on the 4th, made it onto the lawn, but couldn't figure out where the VIP sign-in was. Now, we had only gotten an email from this lady, we didn't actually have tickets. So we had to convince a security guard to escort us over to the VIP table (can you believe he didn't believe us when we said that Jimmy Smits had personally invited us...sheesh!). The cop made it clear that if our names weren't on the list that he'd have to escort us back out to the lawn. Well, lo and behold, our names were there!

We had to get another escort to our seats (no tickets means we had to be escorted at all times...which was fine...made me feel important!) We found our seats, sat down, and started noticing that some people had "production" badges on. These badges got you into a special tent that, among other things, got you free plates of food. I asked one man sitting behind us how he got the food, and he explained we needed a badge. He even offered to let us borrow his so we could get some food! But, neither of us felt comfortable with that, so we said "thanks but no thanks." That didn't change the fact that we hadn't eaten dinner, and probably wouldn't be able to eat until 11:00 or so. About 10 minutes before the show, the same man from behind us got our attention and said that he was going to get us plates. We tried to protest, but he got the food for us anyways! He brought plates with hamburgers, hotdogs, potato salad, baked beans, cole slaw, cookies, watermelon....huge plates. And we ate it all! It was quite a treat to get special "production staff food" while sitting in the VIP section of the concert.

We had a blast! Saw Gladys Knight, Reba McEntyre and lots more. The best part was that we knew we were there because Jimmy Smits had personally invited June :) What a night!

Census!!!

2010-05-24T22:50:00.001-04:00

So, warning: this is going to be a bit of a venting session. I mean, really, do these things only happen to me? Wait...ok fine. Maybe I don't actually want to know... But anyways...

When our census form came in in April I was thrilled. I'm totally into genealogical research, and I know that the different censuses (censi? sensei? haha...) were a vital part of finding out where my family came from (well, the Faust family is still being a bit elusive, but that has nothing to do with the census and more to do with the exact boundaries of the German Empire in the 1730s...but I digress...) My point is that when our form came in, I encouraged (or forced, depends on your perspective) all the roommates fill it out. Then I happily sent it in.

Well, two weeks ago we start getting sticky notes on our front door from someone named Regina from the census. She says to call her so that she can collect our census info. Hmm, well, since we already sent our form in, we just threw away the sticky. Then we get another sticky, and then another. FINE, we'll call! So Lakeiya called her and nicely told her that we had already filled out the form, and asked her to stop bugging us about it. That was the end of that. Right?

No.

Regina showed up at our door a day or two later when I was literally on my way out. She said something like, "Hi, I'm gonna need your name." Well, I had never seen this woman before, she didn't introduce herself, and then she wants me to tell her my name? I brought the absurdity of that request to her attention. She backtracked, introduced herself, and told me that I should be happy she followed up on our house...since we didn't send in our census form. I assured her we did in fact send it in. I also explained that I needed to go now or I was going to be late to work. And that she was wasting my time. She insisted she'd never seen our completed form, which made me feel like she thought I was a liar. Hmph! After many attempts on my part to explain to her the apparent inadequacies of the census collection process, she finally admitted that her people had "lost the forms from this block" and needed to recollect the information.

That was comforting.

You lost my info?!?! My name, my address, my birthday are floating around the bowels of DC? Lovely. And because the absurdity of the fact that my future grandchildren might not be able to find me on the 2010 census because "they lost it" weighed more heavily that the fact that I was going to be late to work, I gave in and filled out the form again. Granted, I didn't know the exact details of all my roommates, but I did my best. I *thanked* Regina and scooted on my way. Two weeks go by and we hear nothing else from the census folks.

Until today.

There was a loud knock on the door this afternoon and Lakeiya answered it. I only heard "blah blah census blah blah" and was down the stairs like a flash. I proceeded to tell the new lady, in no uncertain terms, that we had filled out the census TWICE already, and her people need to get their mess in gear if they lost it AGAIN! I told her that Regina came and we filled out the form together. This new lady all but called me a liar. Her proof? She showed me the quote unquote "form" that the previous person who came by had filled out. IT WAS EMPTY except for a note on the back that said "the resident wasn't able to cooperate and I was told to come back in an hour." This clearly was a lie. No one came an hour ago. I didn't turn anyone away. That form is NOT the form I previously filled out. This woman was lying to me. And I told her as much.

Haha, well...

She proceeded with an impressive bout of verbal diarrhea that consisted of phrases like "don't worry you won't be counted twice" and "this is the official form...and it's empty...so what do you want from me?" I didn't hear the rest: I stopped listening. When she took a breath (and I had a chance to interject) I told her that my real concern wasn't being counted twice, it was the COMPLETE lack of competence the DC census takers had displayed to me thus far. You've LOST my personal information twice: it could be in anyone's hands. You come to my house making me feel like a second-rate citizen because YOU can't do your job. You flat out LIE to me. The census people have been BUGGING us for over a month because they can't be bothered to do their jobs. And you want me to believe you when you say you "won't lose it this time"??

But I filled it out again.

Because the census is important. And because I want to be counted. Let's just pray it works this time!

Devil Weeds

2010-05-11T17:31:00.007-04:00

Today is officially the start of my "summer". Which means little in the grand scheme of things, other than I'm interpreting different classes. BUT, summer makes me think about being outside. And being outside makes me think of devil weeds.

Does anybody know what these are? In our house we affectionately call them “devil weeds.” Why, you ask? Because they’re evil. That’s why. If you know what they are, do you know how to get rid of them? We’ve tried several approaches, but devil weeds don’t seem to respond to traditional “weeding” techniques. For example:

When they first appeared, we tried the old reliable weed-wacking method with the assumption that if we cut them down to the ground, they would die off. Because, you know, most living things *not fueled by evil* can’t grow without leaves. Not these guys. We cut them down and the weeds replied with a “thank you for that refreshing hair cut” and grew to a height of three feet within the next day.

Next we tried some Round Up. You know, the weed killer? Because we assumed it would kill these weeds. We gleefully sprayed them down one evening, knowing that it might take a day or two for the weed killer to kick in. What happened then, you ask? Well, the very next day, the weeds mocked us with a “thank you for the refreshing shower” and proceeded to grow three feet higher. They never died. They only got stronger.

Well, then we (and by "we", I mean the boys downstairs) tried the end-all-be-all method of removing them physically from the ground. But, we quickly found out that there is no “pulling” these guys out of the ground. Their roots are a good inch in diameter and go quite deep. You’d be able to pull a tree out of the ground sooner than you would a devil weed. So, we went all Paul Bunyon on one and with an axe (well, actually we used a shovel) went to town on the roots. And only after chopping up the roots into tiny little pieces were able to pull it out of the ground. This, however, somehow sent a signal to the rest of the devil weeds in the yard to hunker down. The remaining ones grew three feet higher over night.

Have you seen the movie Avatar? If so, you’ll remember that they theorized that the trees and plants were all connected in a network, per se. And the plants were able to communicate with each other using said network. This was not “new” or “exciting” to me. That’s because I know James Cameron got that idea from the devil weeds that grow in our back yard.

Seriously, any thoughts? What ARE these, and how to we make them go away?

Panic!!! It's Snowmaggedon!!!

2010-02-10T16:28:00.003-05:00

This is one of those snow storms where our kids will ask us, "what were you doing during snowmaggedon?" And for those of you who are fortunate enough to not live in the "paralyzing" snow band that's, well, paralyzed us...here's a recap:

Thursday, Feb 4: Panic over the impending storm hits DC big time. I was at work in Loudoun Co, Virginia and needed to go grocery shopping. So I figured I'd do it in VA and miss the crowds of panic-laden Washintonians.

Friday, Feb 5: The snow was scheduled to start around 10:00am. Being the snow-lover than I am, I got nervous around 1:30 when it finally started snowing because none of the snow was actually sticking. I thought this whole storm would blow over with just a dusting. I believe I even called it "snowmaggedon fail". But soon the snow did start sticking. The National Weather Service (NWS) issued a blizzard warning for that evening starting at 10:00pm. The government instituted a "liberal leave" day, meaning that you didn't have to use a vacation day if you didn't want to come in.

Friday evening, Feb 5: After 10:00pm, we walked around in the "blizzard" It was hardly a blizzard, but it sure was fun. The sidewalks were already snowy, so we walked in the streets. We walked and skipped and frolicked in the snow, and generally had a great time. Lots of other residents were out with us, and everyone was genuinely jolly. When we went to bed we had, oh, probably 6-8 inches of snow.

Saturday, Feb 6: When I woke up, I looked out my front window and couldn't see anything. My window was so snowy I couldn't see how much more we got over night. So, I bounded down the steps to look out the front door. But, while I was hopping down the steps (I don't know what happened) I fell, and ended up bouncing down the steps...on my tail bone. It still hurts! We ended up going to our friend Bailey's, who is a good 30 minute walk away. By this point, the snow is knee-deep (20 inches?) We actually got stuck inside our house because our glass door swings out...into that snow. So Sarah managed to pry the door open and then had to shovel the stoop off so the rest of us could get out of our own house. There was so much snow! Walking to Bailey's in snow that deep with an aching tail bone is not fun. Not fun at all. But we hit a stride, and made it to her house before we knew it. We ate lunch, played cards, ate snacks, crafted, ate dinner and then ate cheesecake. On our way home, the snow had stopped (over 26 inches at this point) and we entertained ourselves by throwing snowballs at each other.

Sunday, Feb 7: Church was cancelled, so we opened up our house and had an igloo building party. It is actually a lot of work building in igloo, so we tired pretty quickly. We went inside, had lunch, crafted and hung out. A few of us stayed and watched the Super Bowl while others ventured to other parties. The snow, we're estimating, measured about 30 inches.

Monday, Feb 8: The snow started melting today! Well, at least it was dripping into big icicles. The boys downstairs shoveled our pathway and sidewalk, which was a wonderful surprise. Sarah went to work (why???) and Lakeiya and I stayed home. I worked on the igloo some more (and wore myself out!).

Tuesday, Feb 9: It's snowing again! Today the government was closed for a third day, so we all (except Sarah...again, why??) stayed in. That evening when it really started snowing again, we walked over 30 minutes to a friend's house to have lifegroup. It was a nice walk, but at this point, snowing pretty hard. And it was cold. And the sidewalks were once again impassible. So we walked in the streets (11th St SE is beautifully plowed! But 11th St NE, where I live, looks like it hasn't been touched). I saw my first salt truck today!

Wednesday, Feb 10: Oh my gosh it's a blizzard. Seriously, the winds are so strong that our back door sounds like it's going to fall in. The winds have created drifts higher than our front yard fence (which I'd guess is around 4 feet tall). It's still snowing. Hard. We've started joking that it may never end. Cabin Fever is setting in strong, and we're aching to do something else other than what we're doing: which is a lot of nothing. Sarah went to work (umm, today has been the nastiest of all days, WHY did she go to work???). I cleared off part of our picnic table yesterday, so all the snow there is new snow as of last night. It looks to be about 12 inches high. I'm going to go out tonight to see if I can get a good measurement of how deep this actually is. At 5:40, the snow is still coming down strong! I haven't been to work since Thursday...I'm afraid I've forgotten how to sign!

Prisencolinensinainciusol - ollrait!

2009-12-02T23:23:00.006-05:00

So one of my students showed me this video tonight, and I've fallen in love with it! Ever wonder what English sounds like to Italians? It sounds like "prisencolinensinainciusol"! This video's fun because it's complete gibberish, but sounds *just* like English...with a perfect American accent to boot!

Watch it and you'll see what I'm talking about:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FcUi6UEQh00
And make sure to turn it up, this one's catchy!!!

Now, watch it again, this time with captions someone has painstakingly made: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S00Br2SSrY8.
What a RIOT! My favorite line, "let's freeze that goat!"

And what does English sound like to Bulgarians? "English" captions included :) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_RgL2MKfWTo
TULIBU DIBU DOUCHOO!

Whew, this could keep me laughing all night...

Spoonerisms

2009-12-01T00:41:00.002-05:00

Long before I was born, my mom and dad went to a diner where my mom ordered a patty melt. No big deal, right? But the problem is when she ordered the sandwich she said “matty pelt” instead. Now, I’m not sure why this story carries so much currency in my family, but it is one of the first places we go when we want to tease Mom. Good-spirited ribbings often end with, “...yeah? Well, at least I can say ‘patty melt’!”

After a little research, I’ve found out that these slips of the tongue are called “spoonerisms”, presumably after a guy called Spooner who couldn’t stop his words from mixing up. Well, I’m totally guilty of using that one slip up against my mom...but this week alone I’ve given my family plenty of fresh fodder to use against me. Here’s a small sampling of what I have said in the last six days alone:

--Can we kai the flight? (Can we fly the kite?)
--You can find really teap chickets (You can find cheap tickets)
--I want to bochet a chair (I want to crochet a bear)

Does anyone know why I suddenly can’t stop doing this? I mean, I said “kai the flight” at least three times! I can’t blame lack of sleep (because I did plenty of that during my Thanksgiving break), I can’t blame alcohol (because the only time I did imbibe, I was mix-up free)...so that leaves...genetics.

Yeah, that’s it...maybe I’m more prone to spoonerisms because of genetics...and maybe the abundance of tryptophan this weekend stimulated this bene inside my goty? Uhh, that is, the gene inside my body? Or maybe I need a vacation...to Maui. Yeah, that’d probably cake tare of it.

I was just thinking that!

2009-10-15T13:51:00.004-04:00

I just started reading The Heart Is a Lonely Hunter (why haven't I read this already?!?!)

I have seen a movie adaptation of it, however, where Alan Arkin plays John Singer (the central character, who happens to be deaf). And I am having a hard time *not* picturing him as Singer when I read this book. Not that I have anything against him as an actor, but he's hearing. And Singer is not. Which of course gets me thinking of the whole controversy of hiring a hearing actor to portray a deaf person (when a Deaf actor could not only do the role, but do it better). But the movie I saw was made in 1968 when it was common to have deaf characters portrayed by hearing actors.

But that doesn't happen any more, right? The first real objection I remember over the issue was over the movie "Voices" (1979) where Amy Irving was cast to play a deaf woman. There was outrage! But (correct me if I'm wrong) all recent instances of deaf characters portrayed in major theatrical productions, on TV or in movies have been played by deaf actors.

Well, anyways, this was all going through my head over the last couple of days when lo and behold, what do I hear about this morning?

"Hearing Actor as Deaf Man" cast in a new, major theatrical production of "The Heart is a Lonely Hunter". http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/14/theater/14deaf.html?_r=3&pagewanted=all

In the article, Linda Bove, legendary Deaf actress (whom I've met, by the way..*ahem*), claims "a hearing actor playing a deaf character is tantamount to putting a white actor in blackface.” Strong words, but I believe they're true!

Just to think, I was considering all this last night and *poof*, it appears this morning in the news. Maybe I should consider myself with a million dollars :)

America's for sleeping, Italy's for...getting lost

2009-10-14T16:24:00.005-04:00

Here's an interesting question I heard the other day: what is the scariest thing that's ever happened to you?

Hmm, the scariest thing? I have a hard time saying one thing is "the most" or the "the -est" of my life because...well...I've had a lot of crazy things happen. But *one* of the scariest things happened to me this past summer...

It was a dark and stormy night. Not really, but I feel like scary things should start that way. It was in fact night, though, which by definition means it was dark. But it wasn't stormy. Just dark. Anyways...I was in Siena, Italy, finishing up my second week of classes. There were about seven of us that lived outside the city walls, which meant that we had to take a bus to and from the city center (where school was) each day. After two weeks, we had gotten pretty comfortable with the busses and the bus schedules.

Well, it was Friday night, and we were hanging out at the Shot Bar. I have no idea what the place is really called, but that's what we called it. They had the best music in town, and we could be found there almost every night (that is, when we weren't at our other favorite stop: the Bella Vista). This Friday night in particular we must have been having an especially great time because we missed the midnight bus. You see, when it gets late, there is only one bus an hour. One at midnight and one at 1:00am. And the 1:00am bus is the last one that runs until morning. We had always taken the midnight bus, but this Friday we missed it.

The fact that we missed the bus wasn't a big deal, really. I mean, 1:00am was pretty late, especially since we'd have to get up at 5:00am to catch our train to Rome on Saturday morning. But, frankly, my motto in Italy was "I can sleep in America". There was just too much to see and experience! So, we hung out and danced some more (probably to Michael Jackson songs) until 1:00am.

We caught the bus, no problem, and settled in for our ride home. There were several of us riding together, but we all had to get off at different stops. We'd been through this every day since being in Siena, so we weren't worried. My one worry, however, is that one of the girls was pretty drunk. She was causing a scene on the bus which was funny, but also embarrassing. And since she didn't have a roommate, I worried about her getting to her house ok. Two of the other girls volunteered to take her to her place since they all lived pretty near to each other.

My roommate Krystin and I were the last stop on the bus. So, we hunkered down, said good bye to all of our friends as they got off, and waited for our stop to come. After a while we were the only folks on the bus. The bus soon stopped at the end of the line, but...this was not our stop! In fact, we had no idea where we were! The 1:00am bus evidently takes a different route! The bus driver said something to us in Italian that sounded like "shiwejr ewhkrje heiwrjksu" then pointed for us to get off. We both protested, showing him our address (which, given my Italian skills, is something I did almost everyday) and tried to ask for directions. He nodded, said something in Italian again, and pointed down the road. He shewed us off the bus and drove away.

So here we were: two girls who had NO idea where we were and it was 1:30am. In Italy. In the dark. And in the middle of nowhere. We started walking in the direction that the driver had pointed in, but it was hopeless. We had no idea where to go, and because we were not in town anymore, there was no place to stop and ask. Thankfully, we were together, and for the first hour we remained pretty optimisitc. But after that first hour, we started to wonder how long we'd be wandering around.

We called our three friends (the drunk one and the two others who were walking her home) to see if they could google our location and tell us how to get home. Or at least find a number so we could call a cab. No luck. They weren't at home yet either (dragging a drunk girl around isn't quick work). But our friend Melissa encouraged us to stick to the main road and to keep following the bus stops we found. If we could just keep following the bus stops, we'd surely run into something we recognized (or at least make it back into the city center where we could hail a cab). But we kept walking and walking.

Let me emphasize here the DARKNESS that is Siena! We had been told that the crime rate in the area was 0%, but that did nothing to calm us down. We'd both lived in DC for too long to be comfortable walking around lost at 2:00am. We were freaked. We were singing to ourselves to keep calm when all of the sudden a dark figure came running up to us. I screamed and ran the other way before I looked up to see that it was our friend Melissa! We had wondered close to where she was, along with the drunk friend. So now there were a bunch of us, it was 3:00am, and we still didn't know how to get home.

Well, that's not true. Everyone else knew how to get home except Krystin and I. They had so nicely waited for us to calm us down. Knowing that we were near Melissa's house was great news because we lived close by! We didn't know where, we just knew it was close. So we were happy. The others got the drunk girl home and Melissa joined Krysin and I on our quest. Three heads weren't better than two in this case, and we ended up wandering (literarlly in circles) for an hour more. We happened by a hotel (I was almost in tears by this point from fear, frustration and fatigue) and went in to get directions. The wonderful angel behind the desk spoke Enlgish (!!!) and drew us a map to get home. We made it home around 4:30am.

Then we changed clothes, washed our faces, and literally walked right back out the door to catch our train to Rome. Once we all met up in Rome, we took one of those hop-on-hop-off tour buses and promptly fell asleep. As in, the whole group passed out. We woke up in time to see the Colosseum going by *for the second time*..and we were more than happy with that. Because at least we were sitting, and at least we weren't lost!

See you at Siena School next summer?

2009-10-14T16:15:00.002-04:00

I have been so bad about updating this thing! Trust me, the weird things haven't stopped happening (I've just been slow about writing about them!) While I work on getting myself back into the blogging mood, make sure to check this out!

Here is a blurb from Scottie, the Deaf and ASL Programs Development Coordinator at Siena School. I had SUCH AN AMAZING TIME there last year that I want to share it with everyone else. You've GOT TO GO; it's amazing!

Check it out:

Hello,
My name is Scottie Allen and I am the Deaf and ASL Programs Development Coordinator for the Siena School for Liberal Arts. I have my MA in Deaf Studies/Culture Studies from Gallaudet University and my RID-NAD NIC. I have teaching experience, am published in the NADmag and RID VIEWS, and have worked at the national and international level.
The Siena School for Liberal Arts has worked with the Deaf community since 2005. Our Deaf Studies Department has ambitiously worked with the Italian and American Deaf community. Although the Department runs programs, gives workshops and hosts Fulbright scholars throughout the year, the summer programs continue to be the highlight for the Department, providing ASL users an opportunity to learn Italian Sign Language (LIS) and Italian Deaf culture in Italy.
Please let me know if you have any questions. Thank you for your time and interest.

The Siena School for Liberal Arts, located in Tuscany Italy, offers a unique 3-week study abroad experience in Summer 2010 for Deaf and hearing college students, and a 2-week program designed for professionals in the Deaf-World. These three distinct programs give ASL users an opportunity to learn Italian Sign Language (LIS) in a formal setting, further benefiting one’s international understanding of the Deaf-World.

The Italian Sign Language, Italian, and Italian Deaf Culture program brings hearing students who know ASL from all over America to learn Italian Sign Language, written and spoken Italian and Italian Deaf culture. Outside the classroom, students stay with local hearing families and are completely immersed in Italian culture and language. Through local interaction with the community and local excursions, students are able to learn from both the Italian Deaf and hearing world.

The Italian Sign Language, Italian and Cultural Studies program welcomes Deaf students for a unique study abroad experience, focusing on the Deaf way of being. All teachers and staff have experience working with the Deaf-World and know ASL and/or LIS, reducing the need for an interpreter. Often our students live with Italian Deaf students who come from all over Italy to attend other Siena School programs allowing for a rare opportunity for cultural and linguistic exchange. Students are housed in apartments in the city center.

The Italian Sign Language and Cultural Studies program welcomes professionals in the Deaf-World a unique opportunity for networking and professional development. Using their own experiences as a springboard, students expand and build upon them by taking Italian Deaf culture and LIS. Students can also take an optional mini-course in Italian. Students have housing options ranging from an apartment to a hotel. RID CEUs have also been pre-approved by our sponsor, Professional Interpreting Enterprise, in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. This year’s program will overlap with the EFSLI summer school session, hosted at the Siena School.

The programs for college students, if prearranged with the home institution, have the opportunity to earn college credit. All classes are taught by native users. In addition to classroom activities, the programs have the opportunity to interact with the local Deaf community and see the city of Siena.

To see some of our previous work with the Deaf community, please visit: http://www.sienaschoolforliberalarts.blogspot.com

Request for applications and more information can be directed to
Scottie Allen, Deaf and ASL Programs Development Coordinator, at s.allen@sienaschool.com. Please specify which program you are interested in. Information and applications will be sent out every Tuesday and Thursday to those who request it.
Unfortunately, our current website is out-of-date and out-of-commission. You can still visit it if you would like, www.sienaschool.com. We are working on a brand new website with an anticipated “live” date of mid-October.

Cat Naps

2009-08-13T22:36:00.004-04:00

I got to one of my jobs a little early today, and as is my custom in this situation, I took a little nap before I had to go in. I parked in the shade, rolled down my windows, put my iPod on to Carla Bruni and curled up in the front seat for a little cat nap.

I purposely picked a secluded spot because I am hopelessly unable to sleep when other people look at me. I am the lightest sleeper I know. Seriously, I can't fall asleep when people are awake around me, and will actually wake up when someone looks at me. Well, today, all was well and good until I woke up. I thought to myself, "why am I awake?!?!?" Then I looked up and saw a campus police car parked next to me. The cop was checking on me to see if I was ok. I assured him that I was - I was just taking a nap - and he chuckled and drove off. I appreciated his concern, but because he'd woken me up, I was too aware of the possibility of other people looking at me to fall back to sleep.

This incident today reminded me of a not-so-pleasant experience while at Gall...oops, I mean, the nation's only liberal arts school for the Deaf. Anyways, I was in the old linguistics department building working late on a paper. By 'late' I mean it was probably around 2:00am. Well, I was up in the computer lab and was soon overcome by sleepiness. I decided to take a quick cat nap downstairs on one of the couches. I curled up, set my alarm for 20 minutes and fell easily to sleep. I was sleeping so deeply that when I was awakened, I had no idea where I was or why I was there. Adrenaline was coursing through my veins. I, for some reason, was really scared.

I remember waking up with a jolt. I looked up, had no idea how long I'd been sleeping, and it took me a minute to remember why I was on a linguistics department couch. Then I remembered about the paper. But why was my heart pounding in my chest? What had woken me up so suddenly??? I looked up at the door and was startled to see a campus police man looking back at me. He was just standing in the doorway with his hand on the knob, staring at me. He looked terrified. I was terrified. We just stared at each other for a few seconds and he slowly closed the door and walked away.

My best guess is that he was doing a routine check of the building, saw the light on (I slept with the light on as to not get too comfortable and sleep all night) and wanted to see what was up. He must have opened the door and saw me laying on the couch. My subconscious knew he was there and told me to be afraid, so I woke up. I jolted awake at the unwelcome intrusion. This scared the life out of him, too. But he never said a word, and then he left me to my couch. Of course, I was so startled by the whole event that I couldn't go back to sleep.

It still makes me laugh to watch a movie and see a mom go into her child's room, sit on his bed and stroke his hair - all while he sleeps. This, for me, was never possible. I would wake up just at having my mom walk into the room. Because of this we ended up making a little hanging pillow for the tooth fairy. I'd tuck my tooth into the pocket, close the door with the pillow hanging on the outside door knob. The tooth fairy put the quarter in the pillow's little pocket and I'd find it in the morning. Had she tried to put the quarter under my head while I was sleeping (well, let's just say) I would have been startled awake by a very startled mother...I mean fairy.

New York City!

2009-08-10T18:35:00.003-04:00

I just got back from a fantastic weekend in New York City!

My wonderful roommate Lakeiya invited me to join her, and we left Saturday morning. We took the bus from Chinatown, DC to Chinatown, NY. That's always an experience, but on the way up we had no problems. It only took just over four hours, and voila, by 1:00pm we were in NYC!

We met up with Rachael, a friend of Lakeiya's from school, and we all went to the Met. That is, the Metropolitan Museum of Art. Being there made me realize how nice it is to have so many museums for free here in DC. I mean, I thought the entrance fee to the Met was worth it, but wow, I need to go to more museums in DC! We saw only one floor of the three floor museum, and were totally exhausted by the end. I think you'd need a whole week at the Met to really get everything out of it. It's truly amazing!

We went to Chinatown next and ate some wonderful food at a restaurant called New Green Bo, which was recommended to us by our friend Bailey. We got there and it was pretty full, so they sat us at a table with five older people who were already eating. I thought that was a bit strange, but hey, I was really hungry! It turns out that this group of people we sat with was a group of friends who had come to this restaurant every Saturday for years. They loved it and were very excited to give us their personal recommendations. We had a great time chatting with them and hearing their stories of this amazing restaurant. Turns out that one of the guys sat with Sarah Jessica Parker last month at the very same table we were eating at. Cool. They even invited us out to drinks afterwards :) Instead of going out with them, we walked around Chinatown after eating, got some bubble tea and then walked over to Little Italy. Hearing so many people speaking Italian made me miss Siena! We caught up with Lakeiya's friend Kate, and she drove us back to her place.

Sunday was a lot of fun, too. We slept in LATE, then got up and dressed then helped Kate prepare for a party she was throwing. She had just come back from a missions trip to South Africa and wanted to share the experience with everyone. A whole bunch of wonderful people came over, including her family, and we grilled, ate, talked, and ate some more. After everyone left, we ended up chatting with Kate's landlord for a couple hours. It was really nice getting to know her!

This morning we got up bright and early and Lakeiya and Kate dropped me off at the metro (I mean, subway) and I took it to my bus. But, the NYC subway system is very confusing, and I ended up missing my stop. I figured it out, got back in the right direction, and made my bus out of town with minutes to spare. The bus ride back was good, but long. One thing happened on the bus that was pretty upsetting. The woman sitting in front of me had to pay $10 extra for her baby that she had with her. She was told that children were free, but the ticket collector told her otherwise. She gave the ticket collector a $20, and the ticket collector walked off without giving her change. The woman asked her for the change, and the ticket collector said she'd already given it to her. So, an argument broke out. I guess the customer is not always right when you're in Chinatown, because the woman never got her change back (despite the fact that five or so witnesses, including myself, spoke up for her).

Anyways, I made it back to DC just fine. It was a great weekend but I'm happy to be home. I had a fabulous weekend and can't wait to have a fabulous week!

The X2

2009-08-07T23:04:00.003-04:00

On our way back from getting gravel at Home Depot tonight, my roommates and I ran into one of our new neighbors. In getting to know her and what she does and how she gets there, we ended up talking about the X2. The X2 is an infamous bus line that runs through the city, and it conveniently stops right in front of our house. So talking with her about the X2 got me thinking about some of my weird X2 experiences. Here's my favorite:

I was taking the bus Sunday afternoon to go to an interpreting job in Chinatown. The X2 picks me up right in front of my house and then drops me off right in front of where I'm going to be interpreting. It's so easy! So this day, I get on the bus and even find a seat (which is rare, because it's always so crowded.) We stop at one of the first stops in Chinatown and a man with long dreads gets on the bus. I don't pay any attention to him, but the guy getting on after him noticed something strange. The second guy whispered something to the bus driver and then sat down. The bus driver stood up and announced, "we're not going anywhere until whoever just stole that cell phone gives it back."

Of course everyone looks down at their bags to see if it was their cell phone that had just been stolen. Mine was safely tucked in my purse. But everyone on the bus hears a shrill scream and we all look over and see whose phone was taken. It was taken from the girl who had been turned backwards in her seat, chatting with her friends. Her bag was wide open on the seat next to her. The guy with dreads had evidently seen it, plucked the cell phone right out, and neither the girl nor her friends saw anything.

But the second guy getting on the bus saw everything. And now the girl is screaming about her phone going missing. It was pretty obvious who took it. We all look over at the guy with dreads, and he says, "you expect her to be able to pick out which is hers out of all these phones?" and he reaches into his jacket and literally pulls out like 20 phones. He has a giant pile of phones in his hands, no joke. The girl, who's livid at this point, says, "that's mine. The red one! He took my phone!" and she points out the only red phone in the bunch. Mr. Dreads says, "why should I believe you?" The girl then calls out her number and asks someone on the bus to call it. Someone does, and lo and behold, the red phone rings.

Well, Mr. Dread isn't ready to give her the phone back yet. The girl is yelling at him, and her friends are seriously getting ready to hit this guy. It's turning ugly quickly, and the bus driver is just watching the whole thing. I get up and walk to the front of the bus and tell him I want to get off - I don't want to be on the bus when a fight breaks out. But he won't let me off because the girl hasn't gotten her phone back yet. This makes no sense to me, and I find a place to stand as far away from the brawl as I can get.

Things don't turn physical, thankfully. Mr. Dread can see that he's not going to win. So, he says to the girl and her friends, "fine. I'll give it back to you...for two dollars." I almost laugh out loud. He STOLE her phone, it's OBVIOUS that he's stolen it (and several others!) and he wants to SELL it back to her! Upon hearing this, the girl's biggest guy friend lunges at Mr. Dread. He's going to attack, but Mr. Dread escapes, throws the phone and ducks out of the way. The girl, still screaming, grabs it and the bus driver opens the doors. Mr. Dread runs off to safety with his 19 other stolen phones. The bus driver finally gets back in his seat and delivers me to my destination.

...you can't start sentences with adjectives...

2009-08-06T23:40:00.002-04:00

So, I heard an "English teacher" say today:

"Don't begin a sentence with 'so', 'and' or 'because'. Those are all adjectives. You want to start a sentence with a noun. You can use 'the' because it's the same kind of thing, but it's different. Ok?"

WHAAAT? So, I can't start a sentence with those words? And why not? Because you say not to? Why should I believe you? None of your sentences started with nouns! By the way, 'the' is not "kind of the same thing" as a noun. It's an article, which is "kind of the same thing" as an adjective. Which is a lot closer to being an adjective than 'so' or 'and' will ever be!

I'm glad to see America's finest at work!

Roller Coasters: they're fun, really, I promise!

2009-07-13T09:57:00.004-04:00

So, yesterday we went to Six Flags for Adam's birthday. We had a GREAT time! The weather was muggy, but nice, and the lines were amazingly short. There were at times up to 16 of us all hanging out together and we had absolutely no drama. It was perfect...except for this one thing...

Have you even seen the movie Final Destination? Neither have I, and thankfully I didn't see it before this trip. There's evidently this one scene on a roller coaster where everybody dies. I youtube'd it just now, and suggest NOT watching it!

Anyways, here's why this movie has any sort of relevance on the afternoon. We had ridden several rides by this point in the day, and we were all pretty stoked about riding the next big ride: the Mind Eraser. That's one of those roller coasters where you're actually "hanging" from the track. The "chairs" are suspended below the track and your legs and feet dangle out of the chairs. Some of us had actually come the year before and ridden this one and I remembered liking it. So after only waiting like five minutes in line, it was our turn to ride. We all hopped on and off we went. It was more jarring than I remember but was definitely scary. Overall, a good ride.

This roller coaster did like most do: instead of sending you right back into the station when you're done, it "holds" you on a piece of flat track until the next train can leave the station, and then they slowly bring you in and let you off. So now, the ride for us is over, but we are being "held" while we wait for the next train to take off. Just a reminder, we're dangling from the track (our feet are literally hanging out of the seats) at least 30 or 40 feet off the ground. So, we patiently wait our turn to enter the station, but the normal few-seconds wait turns into a few minutes. The girl next to me starts freaking out. This is one of the first roller coasters she's been on, and she didn't really like the ride (that's putting it mildly, as in, I'm censoring the stream of expletives she let out about how scared she was.) Everyone in the train was starting to get antsy. This one guy in the back starts yelling things like, "hey, don't forget about us!" or "feels like I've been hanging here all day!" (again, those were the blog-worthy things he said - he said a lot of other things, too.) Anyways...people were getting nervous, especially this girl beside me.

After about 10 minutes, two ride attendants start walking over our way. There was a platform near to where we stopped, and they both climb up onto it. The platform was only about five feet away, but dangling from a steel beam 40 feet in the air makes it seem pretty far away still. So, the two attendants, one girl and one guy, come up to talk to us.

The girl says, "should I tell them, or do you want to?"
I'm thinking, "tell us WHAT????"
The guy says, "You tell them"
Again, I'm saying to myself, "WHAAAAT???"
The girl says, "So, we're going to have to get you down from here."
I'm thinking, "here here? Or from the station? As in now, or eventually?"

The girl goes on to explain that the ride is experiencing "technical difficulties" and they've sent for a mechanic to come and fix it. We'd have to stay in our seats til he arrives, then they'd get us down. I asked her what everyone was thinking, "get us down from HERE?" Thankfully she said that we didn't have to leap the five-foot-divide onto the platform, she said that once the mechanic came, he'd be able to get the train to move back into the station. Again, I asked what I thought the crowd wanted to know, "How long will that take?" She just shrugged, but tried comforting us by saying that she'd stay on the platform with us until it was all over.

Ok, so now that guy in the back that has been screaming is now screaming about Final Destination. The girl next to me starts to hyperventilate. I ask her what the movie is about, and she explains that everyone dies when the roller coaster crashes. Wow, great. But I tell her that there's no way we can crash now, since we're not moving. At the very worst, we'd have to sit here for a few more minutes. She tells me her fingers have gone numb...and she was starting to lose feeling in her feet. Fabulous.

Then it starts to get scary. The mechanic comes, does his thing, and gets the ride up and running again. The now-empty train that had been stalled in the station is now leaving the station and making its clink-clink-clink ascent to the top of the first big hill. "See," I tell my new friend sitting next to me, "the other train is moving which means we're on our way into the station now!" But the problem is, we're not moving. And the other car is quickly making its way along the track. As in, if we don't move NOW, we actually WILL crash. And yet, we don't move.

Well of course, everyone starts freaking out. We're yelling and flailing, trying to alert the station of their egregious error. YOU FORGOT ABOUT US! The whole train was now shaking with the motion of the other train, which was barreling closer and closer to us. I found out after we got off the ride that the mechanic had, too, expected that once the second train left the platform that our train would move into the station. But in a way that no one likes to be surprised, he's surprised. He calls on his walkie-talkie (so reports our friends who are still waiting at the platform to ride) for help, and the response is YOU MUST DO THIS NOW, AND DO IT RIGHT, OR THEY ARE GOING TO CRASH. Our friends are freaked out, as are we. The girl who's still standing on the station platform is doing nothing except staring wild-eyed at the station searching for some kind of answer. The second train is literally coming right up behind us and we move. THANK GOD! We move into the station all safe and sound just as the other train is moving into the holding place.

Completely unaware of the fact that the almost-crash wasn't on purpose (because I had and still have faith that these things NEVER ACTUALLY HAPPEN), I admonished the ride attendants once I got safely back onto the ground. "That was completely unnecessary! We were already scared enough, you didn't have to scare us even more like that! That was completely and unbelievably NOT funny" It wasn't until our friends who heard the walkie-talkie conversation actually told us what happened that I realized that no one, including the attendants, thought it was in any way remotely funny.

Needless to say, I continued to ride several more rides that day. Our friends who were still waiting and who witnessed the incident even got on the very same ride once it was fixed. All ended well. Even better, Paul snagged us fast passes and discounted park entrance tickets for the next time we come (because of the mental anguish we suffered while waiting on the ride, don't you know).

So Much Fun....

2009-06-21T06:38:00.003-04:00

...so little time to blog!

Who would have thought that I'd be so busy here in Siena?!?!? I really thought I'd have time to lay around under the Tuscan sun, eat gelato and read books in Italian. But things rarely go as planned, right?

I've been SO busy! But it's been so much fun! We have class from 9:00am til 6:30pm. We have a nice lunch break, however, so I use that to make sure I get my daily dose of gelato. Seriously, I've had at least one cone everyday. I'm also not repeating flavors if I can help it, so I'm going to have eaten all the gelato that Italy has to offer by the time I go home :)

After class, we take a 30 minute bus ride home, where Nonna makes an amazing dinner at 8:00. After dinner, which usually lasts til 10:00ish, we have our homework time. So, getting to the relaxing part has been hard!

When we do have some free time, we're cramming it full of fun things! Last weekend we went to Venice on Saturday, then Florence on Sunday. This weekend we went to Rome yesterday, then we're going to the beach today. Next weekend we're going to Pisa Saturday, then properly seeing Siena Sunday (because I haven't done any touristy things here!)

We're really getting to enjoy Italian life, not just getting the tourist experience. I realized this when we went to visit Rome, Venice and Florence. Siena is the picture perfect Italian town! It has cool stuff to see and has quite a bit of flair, but is still cozy and charming. People here speak far less English than they do in the bigger towns. People here are much nicer than they are in the bigger towns. Siena is the town that people picture when they picture Italy: wonderful people, wonderful food, wonderful art and architecture...perfetto!!!

More updates to come, promise! When that elusive free time comes my way, I'll make sure to use it blogging! But rest assured that I'm having a marvelous time!!!!

June 8 - First Day of School!

2009-06-10T07:22:00.007-04:00

Krystin and I were both really excited for school this morning! We took showers last night so that we would have a little more time to sleep. I slept just fine, but poor Krystin couldn’t fall asleep until much later. We woke up at 7:00, had breakfast (I had cornflakes and yogurt, she had toast and biscuits), and then we caught the bus at 7:50am. Nonna went down to the stop a little before us, since she said she was a bit slower (she’s 73!)

An interesting part of Italian culture is how active the older people are. Nonna, for example, walks everywhere. She has a car but we’ve never seen her drive it. She takes the bus, walks up flights of stairs, carries heavy bags of groceries and never complains. We even saw an elevator next to the large flight of stairs. She commented on how sad it was that this elevator had to be installed because of some kids in the condo in wheelchairs who can’t walk up stairs. Even though she's 73, she never thought about using it for herself and just walked up the stairs like it was no problem. This morning on the bus there were plenty of seats for her to sit in, but she chose to stand the whole way instead. Made me feel kind of funny sitting when my 73 year old Italian grandma wouldn’t even think of it. Oh well!

We rode into the walled part of Siena, and once we got off the bus we made it to the school with no problem. We got there before school even opened, but had a chance to play on the internet for a while before class started (and feed the pigeon, which we call Alfred.)

The first class of the day was Deaf Italian Culture 9:00-10:30. Our teacher’s name is Rita, and she is hearing, Italian and has deaf parents. So, she’s the perfect one to teach us! And, she speaks English, which was wonderful!!!! So far we just reviewed some ideas about culture in general, and only touched on what makes the Italian Deaf Community different. I can’t wait to learn more! After that class we had LIS, Italian Sign Language, from 10:45 to 1:15. Whew! Our teacher’s name is Luigi and he’s Deaf. I was amazed at how hard it was for me not to use ASL and to do only LIS. Some of the signs are similar, and some are completely different. And it’s fun learning a signed language with no spoken language knowledge...but it was a true workout. Especially the numbers! Tomorrow should be fun!

After LIS we had an hour and 45 minute break for lunch. I went with two classmates Mary and Kaylyn to find lunch, and we ended up finding gelato!! Gelato first, then a panini later YUM. I weighed myself the other day so I can accurately know how much weight I’ve put over these four weeks! I'm sure it's not going to be pretty!

The afternoon consisted of another hour of Deaf Culture, from 3:00-4:00, then at 4:30 we had Italian class. That one was a killer! Our teacher, Linda, is good, but she doesn’t seem to realize that we need lots of time to absorb things. She moved a little fast, but I suppose that’s what an intensive class does. One funny thing that happened was that when we were going over some Italian vocabulary the word “zucchini” came up. Linda asked how we say it in English, and we said, “zucchini.” She said, “no, not in Italian, in English!” We said, “zucchini !” We had trouble convincing her that it was the same in both languages! That class ended at 6:30, and I was whooped! We spent some time upstairs in the computer lab hanging out with some of the other students, and then caught the 7:08 bus back home.

One of our other classmates, Alessandra, also was supposed to take the #10 bus. But, it ended up that she needed the one going the OTHER way, and rode all the way back home with Krystin and I before she realized that. She got back on the bus she needed to, and Krystin and I had to explain to Nonna what happened so she could call Alessandra’s host family and tell them she would be late for dinner. Getting this across to Nonna was troppo difficile!! But, we did it! All three of us did a celebratory dance afterwards!

For dinner we had cantaloupe, prechuitto, salami and four-cheese pasta. SO GOOD! We watched the Italian version of “deal or no deal” again, which might be becoming a tradition. We then did a little homework together, until I started falling asleep, and now I’m blogging about it!

Tomorrow will be another fun, but BUSY day! CIAO

June 7 - The afternoon/evening

2009-06-09T06:00:00.004-04:00

After lunch, the three of us students headed back to the school ourselves. Sabrina drew a map for Melissa and Sara, and Nonna just said to me, “just do what we did this morning”. I was hoping I remembered! We made it to the bus stop, took the right bus, and got off at the right place. But, we ended up getting a little lost on the walk from the station to the school. But we found it by asking for directions with our broken Italian.

At school we learned more about the program, got our schedules, and then took a walk around the city of Siena. It’s walled in, and so it consists of the city inside the walls, and the “suburbs” outside the walls. We live outside. Inside things look a lot like Venice: small roads and alley ways and very tall buildings. It can be easy to get lost! We’ve got a map, so hopefully that will help when we go exploring.

After we went back to the school and got our things (including our phones!) and then came home for dinner. Krystin was feeling much better by that time, so she was able to eat all that Nonna cooked. Then, we watched the Italian version of “deal or no deal”, then some crazy soap opera thing with naked women running around. Nonna insisted that Italian TV wasn’t normally like that, but after seeing people around (and seeing that they hide nothing!) I’m not so sure.

I took a shower after dinner, then I wrote this blog! I am afraid to dry my hair since the hairdryer might blow a fuse or something. We’re going to see if we can find a small, cheap one to use while we’re here. That’s all for now! Buono notte!

June 7 - In the morning

2009-06-09T02:39:00.003-04:00

I can’t believe I slept all night! I was a bit nervous about going to bed so early last night, but I just couldn’t stay awake any longer. But, to my surprise, I slept 12 full hours last night! Wow! My bed was very comfortable!

Nonna lives in a condo that has three bedrooms (probably two really: my room looks like it was a sitting room converted into a bedroom) and it’s very spacious. My bed is a pull out couch, which was amazingly comfortable. Not like the ones we have in the US, this was almost more like a futon. It was wonderful! I have a glass door leading out onto the terrace, which is wonderful. At night, you pull these shutters over the door and it gets completely black. So this morning there was no sunlight to wake me up, and absolutely no noise all night. I probably would have slept for hours longer had Nonna not gotten me up!

Poor Krystin isn’t feeling well this morning. She has a stomach ache, and just being in the kitchen with the smell of food was too much for her. So, she went back to bed, with much fuss from Nonna. Hopefully some rest and maybe a walk around the amazing garden in the back for some fresh air will help.

Italy so far suits me perfectly. I really like to eat, and they really like to feed people! This morning for breakfast we had yogurt-type stuff (consistency of stringy milk, but it was sour) with cornflakes, melba toast-type bread with homemade marmalade and espresso. Krystin didn’t want to eat, so was given her portion as well, and ate it! Nonna laughed at the fact that I was so willing to eat, little does she know... It’s also funny because Nonna and I are almost not able to communicate with each other. She talks to me, and I nod if I kind of understand. I also reply with “si”, “no”, “ok” or “va bene!” Nonna knows to not ask questions that require more of an answer yet.

One thing that I’ve noticed is that they don’t drink much here. This was the same in Hungary! For dinner we had wine, which I drank too fast because I was thirsty. But no water. Then this morning, espresso. I’m going to have to buy a liter bottle of water and just take that with me everywhere.

The view here is amazing! I’m going to see if I can steal a couple pictures, and convince Krystin that she needs to go for a walk with me. Right now, Nonna is trying to make her drink some tea. Ha!

Nonna, Krystin and I then went to the school, so we could learn the way on the bus. It seems pretty easy. We just take the “10” bus to a big bus station, then walk about 5 minutes to the school. Of course, Nonna was with us, so of course it was easy. We’ll see if it’s easy the next time we go (alone!) The school is really cute. It’s in an older building, and has a cute garden in front, and it has wireless internet! While we were there, we met two women (one was named Jennifer, and the other ?) who speak both Italian and English. So, that was nice to be able to use them to help us communicate better! Krystin wasn’t feeling very well at all, so she stayed at the school and slept. I checked my email and then Nonna and I went back to the house.

Once we got home, she cooked lunch. Her daughter Sabrina and her two students, Melissa and Sara (our "sisters") joined us. Sara’s luggage got lost, so she was wearing Sabrina’s husband’s clothes! Sabrina’s very nice! She speaks a little English and she understands that she needs to slow down so we can understand. Nonna just keeps talking and talking like we understand her. I’m sure we will more and more, but now it’s a lot of guessing!

June 6 - To Siena!!

2009-06-08T16:46:00.004-04:00

I waited until about 2:00 and was going to wander around the airport a little when I noticed a group of people sitting in the grass, and one girl had a “Siena School” shirt on! I went over and joined the group, and they were actually getting ready to board the bus for Siena! Glad I didn’t wander the airport and keep them waiting!
The group seems like a really nice bunch! I got to talk to one girl, also named Katie, on the bus ride over. She really likes the idea of Gallaudet, and wants to maybe come do grad school there. I also talked a bit with Scottie, and we found out that we have a lot of mutual friends from central Virginia. The bus ride was only about two hours, and we ended up parking in a parking lot and waited for our families to come get us. I am living with a girl named Krystin, and we’re staying with a wonderful woman that we call Nonna (because, like she said, she could actually be our grandmother!)

Her nephew Matteo brought us to the house, then Nonna took us to the supermarket. Krystin and I were like kids, looking around at all the different things. We were helping Nonna carry back her groceries (which were really heavy!) and the bag broke! We got some notebooks and things to use for school, and to keep as a journal so when I write this blog I’ll remember everything!

Nonna speaks no English, and I’m realizing that I know really no Italian at all. If the context is clear, I can pick up on some things, but Nonna likes to talk! I’m often unaware of what she’s saying, but luckily she doesn’t expect an answer :) She made us dinner tonight: pasta with chicken and cabbage breaded in some kind of sauce she had us smell beforehand. Luckily I remembered that the first course of pasta was just that: the first course. I still ate enough of it to make it a meal in America, though! And I had no trouble with the chicken and cabbage afterwards, either. Krystin speaks much better Italian than I do, and together we can often figure out what’s going on, but that’s not always the case. So, we have no idea what the cabbage was breaded in!

I’m exhausted now (not sure how much sleep I got on the plane, but it wasn’t a lot!) So it’s only 9:00 Italy time, but I can’t resist any longer! Good night!

June 6 - In Pisa!!!

2009-06-08T02:55:00.006-04:00

Well, I made it to Pisa! The flights here (once I got on them!) were totally uneventful. The first class flight was nice. I was in the very first seat in the plane, which gave a whole new perspective to things. I saw the air traffic controller out of the window and could hear the pilot talking to the flight attendants. I got a drink before the other passengers had even boarded, which I thought was really nice. And, it was in a real glass, none of that plastic for first class-ers! And the best part was that no one sat next to me!

We boarded the plane about 10 minutes late, and then sat on the runway for a long time waiting for our turn to take off. All in all, we left almost 40 minutes late. Given that I had an hour layover in JFK, I was a bit concerned. But, not too concerned! Even with leaving late, we ended up getting to JFK on time. And because I was in the very first seat of the plane, I was the first one off. But, the gate I needed was on the clear other side of the airport, so I got a chance to stretch my legs and walk...quickly. I got to the gate, and they were already boarding. I didn’t technically have a seat, so I got one (window, bummer) and waited to board. Once again, I didn’t have a seat mate, so I totally spread out. I slept some, not much, but enough to make the flight feel like it passed quickly. AND, they fed us! Totally wasn’t expecting that! I had already eaten, since the website said I’d have to pay for dinner on the plane. But, I saved most of the food and ate it throughout the flight. Then, they fed us breakfast. Nice!

I made it to Pisa then with no problems, my bag was even one of the first out of the chute. I even got some Euros (finally) once I got here! So now I’m sitting outside the Pisa airport under a tree enjoying a nice breeze. There’s lots of other people out here, also waiting for rides. I haven’t seen anyone that looks like they’d be good candidates for the Siena School, but it’s still early. So now I’m blogging, reading, and eating my dinner roll from the plane.
So far so good!

Here are some pics from the Pisa airport! The first thing I saw was this giant pigeon! I love Italy already!

June 5 - And I haven't even gotten on the plane yet!

2009-06-07T17:40:00.004-04:00

Disclaimer: we don't really have internet at the house (it sometimes works, like now, because other people in the building have turned theirs on) so the blog entries will probably be a little late. I'll post them at school. But don't worry: they're all coming!

So my Italy trip didn’t start out so well. I was up waaay too early this morning (excitement!) and was all packed and ready to go at about 8:00. I waited til 9:00 to go to the bank to get some travelers checks for the trip. But, it turns out the bank I went to didn’t have enough checks to give me everything I needed, so they suggested I try the currency exchange in Union Station. Not only could I get the checks, I’d get them in Euros. So, I schlepped out in the rain again, spent way too long trying to find a parking spot, and made it to Union Station at the same time that I had been planning to *leave* DC. No biggie, a few minutes behind schedule was ok, right?

I called my parents to let them know I was running late because they were meeting me near Dulles Airport. They were going to take me there, drop me off, then one would drive my car back to Charlottesville. Turns out they were running a bit behind, too, so it was all good. Once in Union Station I found out the currency exchange place was also out of travelers checks. Can you believe it? I had wasted too much time already, so I decided to get them at the airport and head to meet the ‘rents. I booked it through the rain, and made it to our meeting spot (which was right next to a Five Guys, as fate would have it) at the same time as my folks did! We headed into the diner for lunch because I wanted a nice, greasy burger (do they even have those in Italy?) one more time before the trip. We ate then headed to the airport. I was so excited that I was talking my mom and dad’s ears off. I told them that I had the same exact feeling I had when riding the roller coasters last weekend at King’s Dominion. It was the same anticipation and a little fear that I felt when going tick-tick-tick up the first hill of the coaster. Exciting, but scary, but you know it’s going to be fun.

So, they dropped me off at the airport, took the obligatory picture, and I headed in to check in. I was flying through JFK and Rome to Pisa, then taking a shuttle bus that the school provided to take us to Siena. This time I had given myself PLENTY of time (read the airport tragedy from Maui). I checked in only to find that I couldn’t check in using the kiosk. Why? My flight to JFK had been cancelled because of weather. See, this was ok, because I’d just get on the next one, right? No, because the next one wasn’t for another day! I’d miss all my connections, miss the shuttle bus that the school was sending to the Pisa airport to pick me up, and would miss the first day of school in Siena. Not an option. I told this to the girl and here’s a sample of what our conversation sounded like:

Me: are you sure there aren’t any flights to Italy before tomorrow?
Mean lady: yes. Well wait…there’s one flying through Atlanta…
Me: really? Oh, great!
Mean lady: but it’s sold out.
Me: oh, um, well, see here’s the deal. I need to be in Pisa before 3:00 on Saturday. I have a ride waiting for me at that time. If I’m not there, I’m going to be stranded in Italy. In the middle of nowhere. And it’s going to be Delta’s fault. How can you help fix this situation?
Mean lady: I can’t. Take the later flight or leave it.
Me: can I get a refund?
Mean lady: No
Me: I’m going to be *stranded* [ok, that’s a half-truth: I’d have to fly into Rome and navigate the bus systems of Rome to get my way to Siena, which is just the same as being stranded in my book] and you can’t even look at the computer to find another flight for me?!?!
Mean lady: No

So, I call my parents and tell them to not drive too far off. Luckily they were still in the area, and said they would wait for me to figure out what to do before they drove off. If nothing else, they could take me back to DC where I could do some serious sulking. Then, of course, I called Paul and asked him to work a miracle and find me a flight to Pisa. I was trying so hard not to cry! I was frustrated that I did everything I could have done to make this trip go smoothly, and now that it was out of my hands it was falling apart. And I was incredibly disappointed in thinking that I would miss the first days of my short trip in Siena. Paul said he’d work on it and would call me back. After we hung up, I prayed and tried to keep from crying while reading the Italian bus schedules and figuring how in the world this was going to work.

Paul called back: he did it. He got me a flight to Pisa in time to catch the shuttle. He told me this and I totally started crying. I was so relieved, so thankful, and so amazed that I couldn’t keep the happy-tears in. The only thing is that the new flight was out of DCA, not Dulles. No problem: a quick call to Mom and Dad, and they came right back and got me and brought me to DCA with plenty of time to spare. I checked in, and not only was the woman NICE (ahem Dulles Delta people…) she told me I was upgraded to first class!!! THANKS PAUL! Not sure how he did it, but he did it! I’m sitting in the very first row of the plane  and I’m going to JFK, which means I’m going to ITALY, and ON TIME!

I’m at the DCA airport now, waiting for my first class flight. And I’m so happy!!!

Videos from Maui

2009-05-07T00:41:00.008-04:00

Here's a video on our Road to Hana trip!

(first video: too windy to post!)
Katie: Welcome to our trip on the road to Hana! Paul’s driving our…um…jeep, that we put together, just for this occasion. And yeah, with his own two hands! Now, check out the fact that this looks just like "Lost". And, whooo, tight turns! It’s like a racing game, you know, with the turns. And uh, the forest is amazing *too windy to hear what I’m saying* this is the first leg to the road to Hana. We’ll let you know what happens as we progress.

Paul: ha, literally!
Courtenay: that’s ok, we have a Jeep!
Katie: Ok this is…uh…video two of our Road to Hana trip everybody. Maybe you can tell by the “ping ping” in the background that it’s now raining. But check out the ocean beneath us. It’s very, very cool.
Courtenay: …wanna recommend that we definitely wanna be home before dark…
Paul: so, did you guys know that Harrison and Eileen did this on their honeymoon, and drove down the back road at like 9:00 at night. They could not see and the ocean was right there, the guard rail wasn’t there, so it was a good thing that they couldn’t see ‘cuz they would have been a lot more nervous if…they saw all that…

Also, here's a video of the bamboo forest signing to us. You can hear the leaves rustling and the bamboo clunking together. It was really peaceful!

Maui, Day 7 - The Airport Drama

2009-05-06T17:29:00.003-04:00

We got to the airport, said our goodbyes (Paul left a day after us, Courtenay and Steve just got back to DC two days ago!) Kelly and I walked in, and immediately ran into a crazy long line at the Delta check in place. Evidently, the self-check in kiosks weren’t working, so everyone had to check in by hand. AND, they changed our plane, so everyone flying into LA (which we were) had to get their seats reassigned. The process took FOREVER! We got to the airport just before 8:00, and it was 8:40 by the time we made it through the line. Security took forever too, of course, but Kelly made it through a little before me. She took off to tell the plane not to leave while I finished up waiting behind the slowest couple known to man. I finally made it through security at 9:00, the same time our plane was supposed to leave.

Now, normally missing a flight out of Maui wouldn’t be such a bad thing (oh darn, you mean I’ll have to stay in paradise one more night?), but I had two layovers and didn’t want to mess up the rest of my trip. And I had to teach that Tuesday, and couldn’t leave my students hanging.

I made it through security as they were making the last boarding call for my flight. I headed toward my gate just in time to see that I also had to pass through an agriculture screening. OMG. Seriously? What if you just take my word that I don’t have a mongoose in my suitcase and let me go already? As soon as I was done, I took off running to the gate. But remember that not-so-steady-on-my-feet feeling the boat left me with? And for anyone who knows me, you know I’m not particularly good at the whole coordination/balance thing…So in typical Katie fashion, as I was running up the escalator to my gate, I fell. And I mean fell. As in: splat. It was classic. I picked myself up, and all my stuff which I had managed to throw everywhere, and resumed my running.

By this time in the story, there are a lot of people looking at me. I’m wearing flip flops (made security faster, but running harder) so I’m making this obnoxious smacking sound on the floor as I run. But people were still looking at me like something else was going on. Whatever, I thought to myself…but then I noticed a weird feeling in my shoe. I looked down to see that my flip flop was full of blood! And as I ran, each time I landed on my left foot, blood was being splattered all over my right leg, and the ground behind me. Oh, so that’s why they’re staring…I’m leaving a trail of blood…But I didn’t have time to care! I just kept running to my gate.

I finally saw it, and I was just in time. Kelly was there, keeping it from leaving, and the lady who worked there was like “GET ON THE PLANE NOW!” I gave her my boarding pass, and then said something to Kelly about my foot. It didn’t hurt yet, and I had no idea how bad it was. Everyone looked down at it and freaked out. But I got on the plane anyways.

The flight attendant on the plane also saw my foot, and she didn’t let me sit down. She (understandably) didn’t want my blood all over the place. So, she sent me to the bathroom to clean it up before I could sit, which delayed the plane even more. Once in the bathroom, I saw that the source of the blood was just a tiny cut. Like a quarter of an inch. But it was sure bleeding. So, I wrapped the toe up as best I could with shaking hands, wiped up the blood and headed to my seat. The flight attendant pointed me in the right direction, but to my huge annoyment (how do you like my new word?) someone was in my seat.

In Goldilocks-type fashion, I grabbed the flight attendant and said, “someone is sitting in my seat!” It turned out that the woman, devastated over the fact that she wouldn’t be able to sit next to her husband on the trip, had taken the liberty of sitting next to him, even though that meant I couldn’t. I tried to sit in the seat she was originally assigned, but that had also been filled by some passenger thinking that “seat assignments” were more like “seat suggestions”. The flight attendant had to make like four people move and go back to their original seats so that I could sit down and this plane could finally leave. But the woman was WHINING about not being close to her husband for the four and a half hour trip, so I was like (in a *possibly* not-so-polite way), “If you were able to sit next to him, would you stop whining?” She said yes, and we traded seats. Ugh, just sit down so we can leave already!

But I couldn’t sit down yet. During all of the moving around, people left all their blankets behind and all in my seat. I asked who they belonged to, no one claimed them. So I threw them in the aisle. The flight attendant came by saying that if they weren’t claimed they would be gone for the rest of the flight. Then he took them away. Twenty minutes later the whiny lady started whining *again* that she was cold. I laughed when the flight attendant told her: I gave you the chance to take the blanket and you didn’t want it! Sorry, I can’t bring you another one!”

The connection in LA was good, but short. Kelly headed off to Cincinnati, and I went to Atlanta. And with a stroke of luck, I was given the exit row seat! Yay! That meant that I had much more room to spread my legs out! I slept the whole entire flight (I didn't sleep at all the first leg because adrenaline was still rushing through my veins). The trip from Atlanta to DC was also uneventful. Kelly picked me up from the airport (she had landed a couple hours earlier) and we headed back to the house.

I had never been so happy, yet so sad, to be home before. I miss Maui, but could live a while without another plane ride, that’s for sure.

Maui, Day 7 - Our Last Day

2009-05-06T17:26:00.004-04:00

Sunday was a great day!

We got up early, which for the first time, was tough for me. I had been waking up very early due to jet lag the whole week, but come Sunday, my body had adjusted to Maui time. Just in time to fly back to DC the next day! Anyways, we woke up early and headed out to Lahaina to take a deep sea snorkeling trip.

We all got on the boat which headed for the island of Lanai, where there were supposed to be dolphins and great snorkeling spots. Well, there were no dolphins, but we did get to do some fun snorkeling! On the way the captain (who was very funny) gave us a little history of the islands of Maui, Lanai and Molokai (which we passed on the way to Lanai). We were served a nice breakfast – I ate two pineapple muffins – and then hit the water for our first snorkeling stop.

I rented a wet suit top mainly for sunburn protection. We had gone snorkeling the other day, and Lois got scorched. The back of my calves and thighs were burned. So, I figured at least protecting my back with the wetsuit would be a good idea. And it kept me warm in the water!

We saw all sorts of things in the water! My favorite named fish: the Humuhumunukunukuapua’a fish (the state fish of Hawaii), along with parrot fish, puffer fish, several kinds of sea urchins and corals, surgeon fish…and lots of others I was never able to identify. The difference between the snorkeling trip here and the one a few days back at Ka’anapali Beach was that these fish had no fear. They came swimming up close to me, which totally freaked me out (see my fish blogs from before…ugh!) I didn’t want them eating me or even touching me, so I stayed a safe distance away from everything that moved. That was a little harder to do on the second dive because of the jellyfish! They were only about four inches long, but they scared the mess out of me. And, you couldn’t see them until you were right up on them, and that could easily mean a sting. One time I was face to face (do they even have faces?!?!) with one and I got to see all the electricity-looking colors running all down its tentacles. Cool, but I think it would have been cooler from behind glass.

We had a nice hot lunch (BBQ chicken sandwich!) and then headed back to Maui. It was such a pretty ride, and we even got to see a humpback whale! The last 30 minutes of the ride were pretty choppy but fun. Of course our response to the boat shaking back and forth was to stand up roller-coaster-style with our arms in the air hoping we didn’t fall down. We didn’t, but I felt that rocking of the boat for another couple days.

We got back to Lahaina and went to a little craft fair we saw on our way back to Ka’anapali. It was great! Lots of Maui-made stuff, tasty treats, goofy gadgets, and an overall good time. I got a couple souvenirs…We made it back to the condo for the terribly sad job of packing. Once ready, we hopped into the Jeep, and Paul drove us and Steve and Courtenay to Da Kitchen, a really good local restaurant. We took our time eating because we knew that an hour at the airport would be more than enough. Right?

Maui, Day 6 4/25 THE WEDDING

2009-05-06T17:21:00.003-04:00

I owe you the rest of the story of Maui!

Saturday: the wedding! We didn’t have anything planned before hand, so we did what was the only natural choice – shopping!

The boys had a breakfast for Graham in the morning, so us ladies went out to see what we could find. It was souvenir shopping heaven. The guys ended up joining us after their meal, and we shopped til it was lunch time. We ate at Cheeseburger in Paradise (the original one!) There’s something about Maui that just makes me hungry, so I ate like a pig. We then headed back to the condo to get ready for the wedding.

We got there a couple hours early to help with set up. Kelly, Paul and I were in charge of checking people in (which was a complicated process, especially when I couldn’t understand half the people), but it worked out. Auntie Flor came and translated for us after a while, which was a huge help.

The wedding was BEAUTIFUL!
Graham was beaming as bright as the sun was shining. There were musicians playing pretty songs in ukuleles and the weather was perfect.
Karen and her dad were both crying as they were walking down the aisle (aw!), but I made it through the ceremony without any tears. Kelly, Paul and I headed back to the registration table afterwards to check in the people who came just for the reception (which was no joke, like 300 more people). There were families who RSVPd for two who showed up with eight. There were people not on the list that insisted that they were cousins. We let everyone in. There would be room, right?

There was plenty of room. And plenty of food…and drinks…and silliness. After the toasts and the speeches, and waaay too much food, Karen and Graham had their first dance. Then everyone came up and started shoving money in their clothes! I’d never seen it before, but I hear it’s pretty common in Filipino and Hispanic weddings. Cool. Then Karen did a special hula dance for Graham, which was super cute. Then the dance floor was opened.

The DJ started out the night with the electric slide, and invited the wedding party to come up and break in the dance floor. But, despite the fact that there were like 30 people trying, no one knew how to do it! So, I stepped in and showed them how. It was a riot! We danced all night, ate more, danced again, and finally left around 9:00. Karen and Graham headed off to their hotel room, and we barely made it back to the condo before falling asleep.

Maui, Day 5 4/24

2009-04-25T14:42:00.003-04:00

We didn't have any plans today, which was nice. The trip to Hana wore me out, and not having any plans for the day was exciting.

Cindy had been praying all morning for nice weather, and soon enough, the clouds blew away and we had sun! We piled into the van, went to Boss Frog's and rented some snorkel gear, then headed to Black Rock. Kelly and I put our masks on first, and swam a good distance out to the rock to see what we could see. We saw blue-lipped fish, giant fish with unicorn horns, tiny puffer fish, red and black urchins, and countless other kinds of fish. It was so cool!

When we weren't snorkeling, we were sunning! I've managed to not get burned badly, but I'm definitely pink. Hopefully that pink will become tan :) Paul, Steve and Courtenay joined us, and while I stayed with our stuff on the beach, they went snorkeling and saw a giant sea turtle! I'm jealous :) But they got pictures with an underwater camera, so I can't wait to see those when they're developed.

After snorkeling, we grabbed a quick snack, ran back to the condo to change, then headed to the rehearsal dinner. It was TASTY! We ate at Hula Grill, and I had assorted pupus (appetizers), a salad, macadamia nut encrusted Mahi Mahi, and two ice cream sandwiches for dessert! Sometimes I think I was meant to be born in Hawaii or some other island...I just like the food so much I feel like I was meant to eat it!

Kelly and I took a nice walk after the dinner in efforts not to fall asleep. We all headed back to the condo and watched a little TV before finally giving in and sleeping.

Meeting all the Ancheta family last night at the dinner makes me really excited to see everyone again at the wedding!

Maui, Day 4 4/23

2009-04-25T14:19:00.005-04:00

The Road to HANA!

Wow, we had such a great time! At about 9:00am Paul, Kelly, Steve, Courtenay and I piled into a Jeep and took off! Paul, Steve and Courtenay had spent hours trying to get the top off the Jeep, so we could cruise down the road with the wind in our hair, but after about 20 minutes down the road, we needed to put the top back on.
Not only was the wind whipping us like crazy, it looked like it was going to rain, and we didn't want to try to put the top back on while getting wet. So, we pulled over on the highway and got it back on. Paul asked me a question I'd never heard before: "could you zip this window back on?" It was a bit tricky, but we managed to get it on in just a few minutes.

The road to Hana is...adventurous. I had taken a Dramamine before, and I was happy I did! There are hairpin turns, steep cliffs inches from the road, falling rocks, and mongoose!
But, it was also beautiful: waterfalls, lush rainforests, flowers as far as you can see...it was amazing! It did rain pretty hard for about 30 minutes, so we were all really happy to have put the top back on the Jeep. It look us about four hours to get to Hana, but I didn't feel the time. I was so mesmerized with the view!

We stopped on the way at a little stand to get some coconut candy from a lady named Bunny. Our travel lady here in Lahaina had recommended we stop and meet her. Bunny was a little different, but friendly. We also stopped and got a macadamia nut fudge brownie from the back of a guy's pickup truck. I think it was the best brownie I've ever eaten! We made a stop at a black sand beach. The sand is black because it's crushed lava! The lava also made some caves, which we got to crawl around it. It was so cool!

But our main stop was the hike to the waterfalls. We got to the beginning of the trail, got suited up, and were on our way. The trail is two miles each way. The first third of the trail looked like a normal hike through Hawaii. There were lots of rocks, cliffs and trees. It was pretty, but uphill the whole way! Because the trail was so rocky and full of roots, we had to keep our eyes on our feet. Soon I looked up, and I was no longer in what looked like Hawaii...I was in a bamboo forest! The bamboo was so close together that it almost blocked out all of the light of the sun. I did a little experiment to see how far I could go into the bamboo before the group couldn't see me any more, and it was just a few feet. When the wind blew, the bamboo clunked together and made a really cool sound. Kelly said that it sounded like the bamboo was singing.

Again, all of the sudden, the bamboo stopped, and we were in the middle of a rain forest. It was lush, dripping wet, bright green and beautiful. There were so many flowers and colors: even the leaves of the plants were bright yellow and red. Colors everywhere! There was moss growing on all surfaces, and where there wasn't moss, there was water. We had to be really careful while hiking to make sure we didn't fall! After leaping over a few creeks, we found our reward: a 400 foot waterfall! It feel down a sheer cliff and landed in a beckoning pool at the bottom. There was a sign that told us not to approach the waterfall, so you can guess what the first thing we did was: approach the waterfall!
Steve and Courtenay were brave, and actually stood under it and let it pound on their heads and backs. The water was entirely too cold for me, so Kelly and I just got close to it, and let the spray get us plenty wet. It was really amazing!

The hike back was great because it was all downhill. On the way we were talking about how much this looked like Lost, the TV show, when all of the sudden we heard a moo. There was a bull in the middle of the forest! He was either tied or fenced in, but it was still a little scary to see him! I also saw a rat on the trail (which I thought was a funny little joke from God...) The hike took us several hours, but it was well worth it!

The drive back from Hana was nice. Part of the road wasn't paved, so it was pretty bumpy, but most of the ride was smooth. At times we drove through lava fields, and it felt like we were on Mars. At times we drove through rolling green hills and it looked like we were in Scotland.

Maui truly is an amazing place!

Maui, Day 3 4/22

2009-04-23T03:57:00.005-04:00

It's almost 10:00pm now, but I feel like it's 4:00am! I thought it was just fatigue from being out in the sun all day, but the fact that I woke up wide awake at 6:30 this morning makes me think it's jetlag.....

But other than that, today was FUN! We had a Filipino breakfast again (thanks, Karina, for helping me spell it right!), then headed out to the other side of the island. Karen and Graham drove us in their convertible down to the Lava Fields, which are really cool! When Haleakala erupted years ago, it spewed lava all down the side of the island, and made these amazing "fields" of lava. At times it was really jagged and rocky, and at times it was as smooth as asphalt. It was soooo cool!

We went to the end of the road and ended up at a lava beach. No sand, just lava! And the water was so clear! It wasn't even the picturesque turquoise, but more of a neon turquoise that was still see-through. Much better than any picture I've ever seen! You could see straight through the water to the fish swimming below. I even saw a foot-long fish jump out of the water!

We headed back down the road a bit and parked at Makena Beach. We layed out, I got sunburned, and we all headed back. It was a lot hoter today, and the sun was definitely cooking us!

We made it back to Lahaina, tried to take a nap, but ended up taking our stuff to the new place of residence: the Sands of Kahana. We're here now with Dan, Cindy, Steve and Lois. It's a really nice resort with a really great view of the ocean. I got to see some humpback whales tonight as we were watching the sunset over the ocean!!

After we got settled in, we headed back to Lahaina for a family BBQ. The amount of food was amazing: chicken, pork, beef...in all shapes and sizes. The spicy sili sauce had all us haoles (white people) sweating :) It was a lot of fun, we got to meet lots of Karen's family and friends.

Tomorrow we're off to Hana! Bamboo forests, waterfalls, Seven Sacred Pools...I'll let you know all about it!

Maui, Day Two 4/21

2009-04-22T22:26:00.005-04:00

After our huge breakfast yesterday, we got ourselves ready and went down to Ka'anapali Beach. Kelly and I had, the night before, arranged to meet with a timeshare guy in Ka'anpali to hear his presentation. We had no intention of getting a timeshare, but if we listened to the presentation, we got to get some really, really cheap tickets.

So, we got a ride with Karen's brother Myron (thanks, Myron!) to the beach. Our plan was to hang out there in the morning, and be ready for the presentation at 2:00. We got to the beach around 11:00, got some Maui cookies and some juice, and laid out for a while. The beach was right in front of the resort where Karen is getting married, so we had a little preview. We found a giant checkers game (think Harry Potter style) that used coconuts for checkers pieces! So, we played of course!

We took a walk to nearby Whaler's Village, which is a really neat place with lots of shopping. We went to an ABC store (not alcohol, but touristy things) and got some macadamia nuts. By this time it was 1:00, and we figured it was a good time to look at the map and find out exactly where we were supposed to go.

Kelly looked at the map, and soon discovered that Ka'anapali Beach Hotel (which is where we were) and Ka'anapali Beach Club (which is where our presentation was) are quite far away!! We tried to get a bus, but just missed it by a few minutes. So, we walked!
We started walking at 1:15ish, and didn't make it to the club until 2:15. It was quite a walk but it was beautiful. We even got to see the Sugar Cane Train!

Once in the beach club, we spent a good two hours listening to how good their timeshares were. And the program was really neat. But we didn't want to buy, we just wanted cheap tickets. So, we had to tell them no, and one of the guys got a little ugly/rude with us. Oh well, his loss.

We managed to catch the bus back, but not without drama. We had to take two buses to get back to Lahaina, and each bus cost $1. But I had no cash on me!!!! Kelly had $3, which was enough to get us both back to Whaler's Village, but no further. We figured once we got to Whaler's Village, I could to go an ATM, then buy something cheap and get a dollar for the bus.

The problem is that the bus that took us back to Lahaina left at the same time our bus from the club arrived. Meaning I would have no time to make an ATM/ABC store run. But I tried! Kelly had a $20, so I borrowed that, ran to the store, bought little bag of macs, and ran back to the bus. I made it! We both hopped on the bus, and made it back to Lahaina!!

Once there, we explored Front Street a little more. We had dinner at Cilantro's, which is a great little Chipotle-like place, then went to see the show 'Ulalena. The tickets normally cost $65-75, but we got ours (thanks to the presentation) for $15!!! The show was AMAZING! It was an artistic expression of the history of Hawaii, in a Cirque du Soleil type show. Amazing!

After that we got some ice cream, met up with Karen and Graham (and learned how to jump into their convertible!).
We went to bed early, around 9:30.

It was another great day!!!

Maui, Day 1

2009-04-21T14:45:00.002-04:00

It's finally here! MAUI!

Our flight from DC left Dulles at 7:20, which meant we wanted to be at the airport around 6:00. I was going to drive over to Kelly and Katia's, stay the night with them, then Kelly and I were going to drive out together. I ended up being very slow with packing and getting the rest of my work finished up, so I didn't make it over there until 1:30am! The original plan was to stay up all night, but that was impossible :) I got about three hours of sleep, and after a breakfast sandwich, we were off!

The flight was uneventful. As I boarded the plane, and with a sigh that meant "why do these things always happen to me?!?!?" I saw my seat. It was an aisle seat, but in the middle was a very large man. Which meant he took up half of my seat, too. I greeted him, and the man sitting at the window, and squeezed in. It was not working. This poor man in the middle was so squished, as were the two of us on both sides. I ended up offering to switch seats with him, so he'd have at least a little more space to spread out in the aisle. It worked beautifully. We spent the next four hours on a bumpy, but pleasant, ride to Salt Lake City.

Once in SLC, we had about two hours to kill. Kelly and I got a frozen yogurt (well, I did, she got a smoothie) and hunkered down in a bookstore to pass the time. It was over before we knew it, and once again we were on a plane. This time, my aisle seat was not obstructed: both of the other people in my row were normal sized. Kelly was right across the aisle from me.

Did you know along with having to pay for food bigger than peanuts, you have to pay for MOVIES on the plane now? Yikes! We ended up playing this free trivia game on the plane, which links up all the players on the plane in a competition. With this game, I got to be friends with the two sitting next to me, and we might try and meet up with them later this week!

Once in Maui, things started moving quickly. Auntie Lu came and picked us up from the airport, we went back home for a short time to meet the many people living here, and then went straight to Front Street. Front Street is the shopping strip in the town, with lots of shops and things to do. Kelly and I hadn't eaten since 5:00 that morning (which meant about 18 hours without food....we both refused to pay for it on the plane), so we set out to find something to eat. But, we ended up talking with a few "activity directors" and got us a HUGE discount on some local things to do. We had a fantastic hamburger, a free ice cream sundae, and then headed back home.

We're headed to Kanapali beach today, then to a cool play called Ulalena (which is a Cirque du Soleil type history of Hawaii). I slept amazingly well last night, and woke up to hearing roosters crowing this morning! HA! I've just eaten a huge Philippino style breakfast of rice, spam, eggs, veggies and bread. I'm going to get ready for the beach, then off we go!

Pictures coming soon! Be on the lookout!

"Would you just like me to make you something?"

2009-04-01T00:18:00.005-04:00

I was on my way to work in Manassas yesterday when I noticed a Cold Stone. Now, it's been like...years (not really, but you know...) since I've had Cold Stone ice cream. Seeing the store made me really want some. By the time I was able to get to the store, they were almost closed (as in, five minutes left). But when I walked in, the guy behind the counter was still very smiley, and not at all annoyed that I was coming in so late. He asked me, "what can I get for you?"

I replied, "uhhhh"

I'm the most indecisive person I know. I can make a decision about "should I stay in bed or get up and do laundry?" very easily, but when it comes to narrowing down a list of 3,349 different ice cream options, I was unable to think. Literally. After my amazingly articulate "uhhhh" response, I tried again. "I'll have one of everything!"

The guy behind the counter was amazingly patient. He laughed, and instead of getting annoyed said, "would you just like me to make you something?" And not in a mean way, but in a "I want to show you what I can do" kind of way.

"YES!", I said. "That's the best idea I've heard all night. By all means, YES!" I gave him permission to use his creative ice cream talents to make me something special. I thought about giving him some restrictions (make sure it's chocolaty, and don't use any gummy bears...) but decided to give him free reign and let him do his job. And boy did he do his job!

He came up with a huge bowl filled with dark chocolate and coffee ice creams mixed together with white chocolate chips, graham cracker crust, oreos and marshmellow fluff all mixed in. When he presented it to me, I almost wept. It was perfect. But BIG. And probably going to be expensive.

But instead of charging me full price, he charged me for less than a small bowl of ice cream would have normally cost. I don't know if he was anxious to get me out of the store, or if he was trying to flirt with me. Either way, I was ecstatic.

I went home HAPPY and full of the best tasting ice cream I've had in like, well...years.

Where you from?

2009-03-18T21:48:00.004-04:00

It's strange, but twice in two days I've been asked that very question. The strange thing about it is I can't remember ever being asked that before!

I've always thought of myself as pretty accent-less. My parents are from Iowa and speak what linguists (cause I know a few...) would call the Standard American accent. In other words, no accent. I grew up talking like them, with a little Appalachain Virginia thrown in there. ps - that's apple-A-chun, with the middle A sounding like Kay not cat, fyi.

I remember visiting my cousins in Iowa, and running and ducking for cover when one of them asked me if I wanted "a pop". See, where I come from, that means you're gonna get hit, so I ran. He just wanted to offer me a soda :) See, my midwestern family would comment every once in a while about the fact that my sister and I sounded more "Virginia" than we did "Iowa", which I took as a compliment, don't'cha know.

Then I moved to North Carolina, in the land where an affirmative answer is granted two syllables - yay'us - and the Lord's Son goes by the name of Jay'sus. After four years, I guess I ended up sounding a little more like the locals. I even caught myself saying "what kinda coke do you want?" once. This is something my mom likes to tease me about, but that's cool. I like to tease her about me living in "Warshington" DC.

All in all, though, I sound pretty unremarkable, so I thought. But yesterday while picking up the furniture from craigslist, the guy selling it to me said, "so, where you from?" I told him Virginia, and he goes "I knew you were a Southerner". Now, 'dems fightin' words depending on who you're talking to. Northern Virginians might balk at being compared to their Southern/Western country sounding neighbors. Since I'm neither, I was fascinated. "Really?" I said, "why, where are you from?" "Up state New York." "Oh, so pretty much anyone below the Mason Dixon sounds Southern?" "Pretty much"

THEN, today while I was interpreting (not while while, but you know, while) the teacher goes, "so, where are you from?" I laughed: twice in two days! But this time he thought I sounded like I was from New York. He's from the Candian-sounding part of Michigan, so I can't fault him for getting a little confused. I mean, when you're surrounded by people who say the "o" in "sorry" like an actual "o", you might juse lose sight of what other Americans sound like.

I just thought that was weird, in a really neat way

I'll Just Take Those...

2009-03-17T23:53:00.003-04:00

I'm now an official craigslist.org addict. I've sold a few things (thanks to my roommate!) and bought a few things with my returns. The furniture in my living room is looking much more...matched.

Anyways, I was picking up a table today from a guy in an apartment building. In order to park in the visitor's spots, I had to go in to the front desk and sign my car in. This meant also handing over my car keys. They keep my keys while I'm parked, and I don't get a ticket. Sounds simple.

So, I pick up the tables and the guys selling them help me bring them to the car. While they're walking the stuff out, I run to the front desk to get my keys. Here's an exchange of what happened:

Me: Hi, I'd like to pick up my car keys.
Front Desk Guy: Umm, you didn't give them to me.
Me: Yes I did, five minutes ago
FDG: Yeah, well, I don't have them, the valet took them
Me: Why does he have them? Well, call him and tell him to bring them back
FDG: I can't do that. He doesn't have a phone, and his walkie talkie isn't working
Me: So, go find him. I have people waiting for me, and I'm late [for lifegroup!]
FDG: I can't leave the desk.
Me: You will, because I need my keys!
FDG: uhhhhhh...
Me: AHHHHH!!!

Then, the Front Desk Guy tells me to go into the garage and look for the valet guy. I do this, to find that the garage is locked. I go to my car and explain to the guys what's happening. They have a cow and the one goes in and yells at Front Desk Guy. Front Desk Guy says it's MY fault, because I came down too quickly (WHAT?!?!?). Valet Guy is no where to be seen/found, but I'm told "he'll have to come back eventually".

So, we wait for a good 20-30 minutes when Valet Guy returns (where was he? Nobody knows...) with my keys. The guys help me load the tables and I'm on my way. I got three great looking tables but was 30 minutes late to my meeting.

Squirrels = Evil (the end of the story)

2009-03-11T19:27:00.002-04:00

I was still laying in my bed, but now I was paralyzed with fear. What now? He's IN the cabin! He could, in one giant leap, be on my face, scratching my eyes out and eating them like acorns. I was too afraid to move or to make a sound, and the other girls in the cabin with me were all still asleep. The squirrel sat up on his hind legs and looked right at me. "Thought you could outsmart me, huh?" he seemed to say. And I couldn't get over the fact that he was so big.

He jumped onto the back of the sleeping girl he'd already peed on once before, and looked me in the eyes again. He was claiming what was his, and made sure I knew it. I knew that if I angered him, I risked injury, or possibly death. "Girl Eaten Alive by Raging Squirrel" the headline would say. It would be gruesome. So, the two of us sat in our silent tug of war, him looking at me, me looking at him. Neither of us moved. I looked over at the hole and saw that the tape once covering the hole had become tangled and now blocked the hole shut. The squirrel couldn't get out if he wanted to, which I knew he didn't want to.

My mind raced to what would happen if the other girls woke up and found him in the cabin. They'd scream. He'd scratch. It'd be mayhem. That's when I knew I had to get him out, one way or the other. I ruffled my covers to let him know I was planning to move. He looked at me questioningly. I carefully climbed out of bed and walked over to the door of the cabin, never once turning my back to him. I opened the door slightly, and foolishly (but quietly) said, "here little squirrely. Come over here and climb out the door! I've opened it, just for you!" The squirrel upon hearing my voice went into a frenzy. He started running around the perimeter of the cabin, jumping from the back of one sleeping camper to the back of another. "Don't wake up!" I silently pleaded to the girls. I was now standing on the empty bed with my arm still holding the door open. The squirrel had made about five laps around the cabin and realized he could escape, made a run for it. He lept to the hole, and noticed it was blocked by tape, jumped over me and out the open door.

I sat there for a few minutes trying to calm myself down. I then walked, dazed, back to my bed and laid down. One of the other girls heard me and woke up. She asked, "Katie, what are you doing up so early? Breakfast isn't for another hour or so...wait, why is there squirrel poop in my bed?"

"Go back to sleep" I told her, "I'll tell you in the morning". And then we both, miraculously, fell back to sleep.

Squirrels = Evil

2009-03-10T18:05:00.003-04:00

I hate squirrels.

This weekend I took advantage of the fact that the weather was beautiful outside and planted some seeds in our back yard. I checked on them yesterday and found total devastation. The pots in which I had planted the seeds were obviously dug through. I mean, if I planted four seeds two inches apart from each other, you could see four little squirrel holes two inches apart from each other. Annoying!!!!

You see, I never really liked squirrels, even before I got to DC. I remember once at camp, sometime when I was in high school, I had an unfortunate encounter with a squirrel. We slept in these cabins that had wooden floors and roofs, but the walls were made mostly of screen. The same kind of stuff you find on windows. Our cabin had a hole in the screen, which was the perfect size for a squirrel to fit through. We knew one was coming in, too, because of the "presents" we found around the cabin. Once, I went to grab a cookie from a box of pecan sandies my mom had sent me, only to find all the pecans had been picked out. Another time, one of the girls woke up with a damp back. Assuming she was sweating (because it was really hot), she didn't think much of it. It wasn't until the rest of us saw that her back was yellow did we realize a squirrel had *peed* on her during the night. And they were constantly pooping all over.

We knew we had to fix the hole. But all we had to do so was a roll of duct tape. We covered the hole with the tape - sticky side out - in hopes of not only deterring the squirrel from entering, but watching him get his head stuck in the process. If that sounds cruel, you've obviously never met a squirrel. Spend some time being tortured by one and you'll understand our glee. We went to bed with visions of frustrated, sticky-headed squirrels in our heads.

That next morning, I woke up early when I heard a *thump*. It wasn't a sound I was used to hearing, so it took me a minute to register what was going on. But, as soon as my eyes focused, I found myself staring a squirrel right in the face. My head was mere inches from the screen wall, and on the other side, there was a squirrel clinging to the screen looking me dead in the eyes. Terrified, I didn't make a sound. He was a lot bigger than I thought he would be. I mean, squirrels are small. But this one was almost as big as a cat. And he was so close to my face that I could smell his little nutty breath.

I just laid there looking at him, afraid to make a sound or a movement that would set him off into a squirrely rage. But then I remembered - he couldn't get in. Ahh, the joy! Here he was, wanting in, and his only entrance was taped shut. He seemed to have the same thought at the same moment, and scootched himself across the screen to where the hole once was. He started examining the hole, and while still clinging to the screen, he placed two paws above it, and two paws below it. I silently laughed at him, thinking this was going to be a great story to tell the other girls once they woke up.

But then the squirrel reared his little head back, and butted it into the tape as hard as he could. I almost squealed. He was trying to get in! Much to my disappointment, he didn't stick to the tape. But, after a couple head buts, it became clear that the tape wasn't going to hold much longer. This wasn't part of the plan. In a last-ditch attempt, the squirrel swung his little head as hard as he could against the tape, and it came loose from the screen. The squirrel tumbled in through the hole and onto an empty bed.

What happened next? Stay tuned :)

Weird Weekend I, Part III

2009-02-28T00:26:00.002-05:00

I told my friend where I was, and that she needed to come find me. I hung up, and looked down at myself. I was literally covered in blood. I didn’t have any tissues in the front of the car, and now that my one hand was so slippery with blood, I was no longer able to keep my nose pinched shut. I reclined my seat with my clean hand, and leaned my head back as far as possible and closed my eyes. I realized my friend had found me when I heard a scream. I saw her face looking in at me through the driver’s side window. And what a sight I must have been. My shirt was covered in blood. My hands, both of them at this point, were covered in blood. Blood was dripping off my chin. There was blood on the steering wheel, on the gear shift, and on my cell phone. And here I was lying down with my eyes closed. I’m sure I looked more dead than alive.

I gave her the keys, and she rummaged through my trunk until she found some paper towels and a bottle of water. We used them to clean the car up, and to clean me up, as best as possible. The car ended up looking great, but the blood wasn’t coming out of my shirt, which left me looking like I had been drinking human blood for breakfast. I couldn’t go into the park looking like this. My nose had stopped bleeding, thankfully, so I took my shirt off leaving only my swimsuit. As we tried to walk into the park to meet our other friend, I was told that I needed a shirt: no shoes, no shirt, no entry. I was stuck, and ended up having to use the rest of the money I had with me (the money I was going to use for food) to pay for a new shirt. It was one of those cheap t-shirts with the park’s logo on it for no less than $20. Awesome.

Amazingly, we ended up having a great time at the park. I was playing it easy for a while, concerned that my nose would start bleeding again at any moment. It didn’t, and I had a lot of fun. I didn’t get tired until the park closed at 10:00, when I started to feel that two and half hours of sleep catching up with me. And I had an hour’s drive home to look forward to. Again, by the grace of God, I made it home accident free. But I was dead tired. I didn’t remember that I didn’t have the keys to the house until I was already at the house, and driving to my sister’s to get them at that point was unthinkable. I knew my mom had been planning on arriving home from South Carolina sometime during the night, and debated waiting outside for her to come let me in, or making the scary jump into the basement again. I decided to stay outside, since the jump had almost ended badly in broad daylight, which meant jumping into a pitch dark basement wasn’t going to be an option.

I curled up in the back seat of my car, with my bloody shirt in a ball in the front seat. I should have known to at least warn my mom, but for some reason, I didn’t. Again, I was awoken with a scream, this time I saw my mom looking in the window at me. She had gotten in about an hour after I fell asleep, and all she could see clearly was a bloody shirt in the front seat and her daughter’s body in the back of the car.

I spent the next day trying to recount the weekend to my mom and explaining that it was really less scary than it sounded (not really, but…), returning the unused blank check to my sister, and having to explain to Mr. Obnoxious that there was really no chance of him seeing me again.

Who Would Have Guessed???

2009-02-27T19:32:00.007-05:00

My humble little blog caused quite a stir!

Did you read my last entry about my classroom at Gallaudet being blocked? Well, some higher-ups at the school did they didn't like it too much.

My intention was only to vent frustration, not to make the school look bad in any way. But in the process I ruffled some feathers. I understand each institution has it's share of blunders, and that Gallaudet is in no way unique in that respect.

So please don't read too much into my post. The point of this blog is that weird things happen to me quite often, and this was one of those weird things.

Excuse me, can you move your food??

2009-02-25T23:15:00.005-05:00

I was at Gallaudet yesterday, getting ready to teach. Like I always do, I headed over to the classroom a little early to get things set up. On my way into the building, about three people told me, "the banquet is right inside". Hmm, I thought. Banquet? Sounds tasty, but surely it's not for me.

Sure enough, I got to the atrium, and found it blocked off, guarded by signs that read "By Invitation Only". Too bad. It sure did smell good! As I made my way through the crowd of people and food towards my classroom, I noticed that the large table with all the food on it was....directly in front of my classroom door!

I went up to the guy serving food just inches in front of my class. Here is the conversation we had:

Me: Excuse me, but that's my classroom you're blocking
Guy: Oh
Me: I need to get in to teach
Guy: Well, you can't. We're serving food here
Me: Yes, I see that, but my class is at 1:00 [in 10 minutes] and I'm going to need to get into my classroom. So will my students.
Guy: We can't allow anyone back behind the table, food safety regulations and all.
Me: But my...
Guy:...you'll have to cancel your class
Me: WHAT? Who are you? Who's in charge?
Guy: that guy, over there
In-charge-guy: What's the problem
Me: your food table is directly in front of my classroom, and my class starts in five minutes. How should my students and I get in?
In-charge-guy: Hmm, well, we're not supposed to let people behind the table...but *rolls eyes*, go ahead
Me: gee...thanks

So, I weaseled my way behind the table, trying not to knock over the tuna salad or the olive tray. Once in the classroom, I noticed a giant pile of coats and bags taking up at least three of my desks. It seemed like all of the workers put their stuff in here. I went back to the guy, told him he needed to move his stuff because I needed those desks, and he got his henchman to move one of the coats. So there was still a pile of stuff.

I had to stand in the door and flag down my students to prevent the guy from trying to turn them away, too. Not everybody showed up. Why would they?

An hour into the class, the guy opens the door and starts to retrieve his coat and bag. It seems the invitation I gave him BEFORE my class didn't work for him, so he decided to interrupt my class to get his coat. He came in, I told him to leave and come back when my class was over, but he didn't leave. He said something like "sorry", and I told him, "don't worry, I'd love to wait for you to get your stuff. If you feel like you're interrupting, it's because you are. But take your time" He picked up on the sarcasm and was embarrassed. I just stared at him until he left.

My question is, HOW does one not think when setting up a banquet? Thoughts like, "wow, this is a school...so they might actually use those classrooms" never entered anyone's heads. Amazing. Yet, typical. As the say, "Welcome to Gallaudet"

Weird Weekend I, Part II

2009-02-23T08:48:00.002-05:00

That left my sister to call. She was living close by, relatively, and would be able to come get me. I knew she would be awake, and so I gave her a call. I explained the situation to her over the phone, and we both agreed that while Mr. Obnoxious was…obnoxious…we couldn’t leave him stranded downtown alone. But, he lived in the middle of nowhere, some 45 minutes away. It was quickly approaching 1:00am, and my sister (you can’t blame her) didn’t want to drive him all the way to his house and back. We decided the only option was to bring him back to her apartment, too. We got in around 1:30, and found that there was a party of sorts going on. My sister’s roommates had some friends over, and now that she was out of the house, the friends had gotten a bit loud. So when she, Mr. Obnoxious and I rolled in, there were suddenly way too many people in a too small apartment, and it was entirely too loud. I ended up sleeping on the living room floor, the only available place, while Mr. Obnoxious slept on the couch. I won’t even comment on the fact that he should have offered me the couch, being a girl and all, because he’s obnoxious to the core. It would be like commenting on the fact that a fish refused to leave the ocean for dry land. Why would he? It was well after 3:00 before I fell asleep.

To further complicate the situation, I was supposed to meet my friends at the amusement park the next morning…well, later that morning, at 8:00am. A mere five hours away. But, I still had to get my car out of the garage with money I didn’t have, drive back to my parents to get my things, and make the hour long trip to the park. All of this meant that I got less than three hours of sleep. My sister drove me and the guy back to the garage at 6:00am, and gave me a blank check for the fee. Such a wonderful sister! I got my car, pulled up to the attendant at the gate, and using my best smile, a handful of “pretty please?”s , and possibly a crocodile tear or two, I talked him into letting me out for free. I didn’t even have to pay the original fee for using the garage. Mr. Obnoxious wanted me to drive him home, but I refused, and dropped him off at a cab depot instead. I believe I said something like, “find your own way home”, and left.

I got to my parent’s house in record time, only to realize that I had left their house keys at my sister’s. I didn’t have time to drive back into town, get the keys, then drive back to my parent’s if I was going to make it to the park on time. So, I decided to break in. I walked around the perimeter of the house, checking all the windows to see if any were left unlocked. My mom and I had actually broken into the house before doing this, so I knew it would be possible. But this time the only window open was the one leading to our basement. This is how it worked: the basement window was very close to the ground on the outside of the house, but flush with the ceiling of the basement on the inside. To jump in through the window meant jumping down about 8 feet, which also meant jumping out about three feet to avoid our washing machine. I was working on about two and half hours of sleep, but was chock full of adrenaline. I closed my eyes, held my breath, said a prayer and jumped. I landed on my feet, but quickly fell over and banged against a shelf, almost knocking it over. I was ok, but made quite a racket, which sent my dog, who was snoozing upstairs, into a frenzy. She stood at the top of the stairs, barking like mad, but too afraid to come down and investigate. As soon as she saw my face, she erupted into doggie laughter, wagging her whole body and making sounds very similar to the sounds Chewbacca makes. I let her out, gathered my things together, brought the dog back in, and was in my car in less than five minutes.

The drive to the amusement park was uneventful. I had gotten a speeding ticket earlier in the year and was terrified of getting another. But I also have a severe dislike of being late, and was therefore filled with inner turmoil the whole hour I was driving. Get a ticket, or be late? By the grace of God, I didn’t get a speeding ticket, and I even ended up being right on time. I pulled out the cash I was saving for parking at the park, and pulled up to the gate to give it to the lady working there. As soon as I did this, one of my friends called me to tell me she was at the park and waiting at her car. She started giving me directions to where she parked, when all of the sudden my nose started bleeding. So, here I was: one hand holding a cell phone to my head, the other hand was out the window of the car handing cash to the parking attendant, all the while, blood gushing out of my nose. The attendant gasped, quickly took my money and ran away. I grabbed my nose, tried to pinch it shut to stop the bleeding, and held the phone with my other hand. I drove through the parking lot using only my knees. I parked as soon as I could, not close to my friend, but not being able to drive effectively, I was just happy to not have crashed.

Weird Weekend I, Part I

2009-02-21T21:44:00.002-05:00

One of the weirdest weekends of my life happened the summer between my freshman and sophomore years in college.

On that Friday, I had made plans to go out with a guy that I really wasn’t all that into. He was a friend of a friend’s friend (so in other words, almost a complete stranger), and had a completely different outlook on life than I did. I grew up in a fairly conservative household, but my parents raised me to be tolerant of differences and respectful of others. This guy, I’ll call him Mr. Obnoxious, routinely shocked me by staring down the shirts of waitresses when we went out to eat, or worse, using ugly racial epithets when referring to good family friends. We went out a handful of times, and each time I found myself biting my lip to hold back words of scorn, or sitting on my hands in an effort to not punch him. He was “backwoods”, and had attitude to go along with it.

We were out this Friday, playing pool, when he started blatantly staring at the rear end of a woman playing pool at another table. I saw him, called him out on it, and he replied, “hey, sweetie, you should be glad I’m with you, not her.” And that was it, I was ready to go home and never see him again. I told him I was leaving, and that he needed to find another ride home, since I had driven. He didn’t understand why I was mad, and proceeded to pepper me with questions while following me to my car. I had parked in a garage, since street parking was very limited. It wasn’t until we reached the garage and saw the giant gate across the entrance that I noticed the sign on the front: Garage Closes at 11:00. It was 11:30. So, here I was – stranded – with Mr. Obnoxious, and it was quickly approaching midnight.

I was in a place in my life where money was tight. I had a few jobs at college, each paying little more than minimum wage. It was enough to get me through the school year, but not enough to put any money aside for savings. The money I used during the summer was only the money I was able to earn over the summer. That year, I had been interpreting in Charlottesville, which meant getting paid only once a month, if I was lucky. There just wasn’t that much work to be had. But, I didn’t need much money, since I was staying with my parents, rent free, and was enjoying the time off.

So far over the summer, I had put aside just enough money to pay for a few tanks of gas and to buy a ticket to King’s Dominion. A few friends from college and I were planning on spending the next day, Saturday, at the amusement park, and I had just enough money to make it work. But now looking at the sign on the garage entrance even closer, I read the fine print: “Vehicles left overnight are subject to additional fees.” Great. There was no mention of how much the “additional fee” was, and of course, no one was on duty to tell me. I had bought the ticket to the amusement park already, and literally had about four dollars to my name. I highly doubted this would be enough to spring my car the next morning.

I considered calling my parents, but stopped myself before making the call. First of all, I knew they would freak knowing that I was car-less, downtown, with an annoying guy, and with almost no money. Secondly, I didn’t call because I remembered they weren’t home. My mom, who makes wedding cakes, was actually delivering her latest creation to the happy couple in South Carolina. My dad, who’s into biking, was actually in Utah with his buddies, riding some mountain trails. Neither was able to help me, which meant neither had to know I was in trouble.

So what happened? Stay tuned to find out! :)

Clean off your car!

2009-02-03T15:27:00.003-05:00

I'm very excited about the new law that was just passed this morning!

DC drivers will now have to clean the snow and ice off of their cars before driving to work. If you don't, you may get pulled over. And while this year, no fines are in place, don't be surprised to see some next year.

I don't know, but to me it just seems reckless to have a giant sheet of ice hurl off the top of your car and into the windshield of someone else. I don't see how driving while on a cell phone is any worse. Or driving drunk for that matter. And if tickets are given to drivers holding phones or beer bottles, they should be given to cars that hold deadly projectile weapons of ice.

Next law I want to see passed?

Drivers getting tickets for running out of gas. I mean, did you seriously think you'd make it all the way home on 1/100th of a tank of gas? Since you've stalled out in the middle of the road, and now that the cops have to come and direct traffic because you're holding up the ENTIRE interstate, they might as well give you a ticket for thinking you could defy the laws of nature.
Truck drivers getting tickets for driving under bridges that are too short. "Honest, officer, I didn't see those 1,067 signs warning me that my 15 foot truck wouldn't fit under a 13 foot bridge!" If you can't read signs, you should be driving. In fact, you should get fined for then making it impossible for the rest of us (who are well under 13 ft) to drive under the bridge.

Adjunct Computer Lab

2009-02-02T19:46:00.002-05:00

So, I'm sitting in the Adjunct computer lab, which has about 12 computers. Since it's 8:00 in the morning, it's quite empty. When I first come in, there is only one other person in the lab. I grab a computer at the end of the row, on the opposite side of the room, and spread my stuff out. I mean, normally, I'm very conscious of how much space I'm taking up, and if I'm encroaching on the space of others, but today, there's no one here, so I spread out.

Sidebar: it really bugs me when people take up more than their fair share of space. For example, in the car. I know guys like to sit with their legs hanging wide open, but when there's four of us in the back seat, don't sit like that! You're taking up the space of two people, which means someone else (probably me) needs to take up the space of half a person. The moral? Think about how your actions affect others!

Anyways, so I'm in the computer lab. With my stuff all over the place. The only other guy in there with me is an over weight, middle aged teacher who hasn't probably didn't have a good night sleep. I know this because he's totally sleeping at the computer at the other end of the room. And by sleeping I mean snoring. As in, seriously, maybe you should get that checked out. But every couple of minutes he wakes up and pretends that he was working. It's funny because he totally thinks I don't notice. I put in my headphones and crank up Carla Bruni so I don't have to hear him.

In comes teacher #2. Now, remember, there's about 10 available computers. But where does this guy want to sit? Right next to me. As in, he sits down, gives me a dirty look because my stuff is all over the place, and continues to look at me like that until I move it. I do move it, because I would rather do that than have a confrontation, and he sits down. And then HE spreads his stuff all over. As in, encroaching on my space. I think, "are you kidding me???" but don't say anything because I'm just not that interested. He scootches his chair closer to mine as if to add insult to injury.

After a few minutes, I see him looking at my computer screen. Because, apparently, there's 10 other computers, including his, but mine seems to be the most interesting. I glance over at him, and he doesn't look away. In fact, he looks right at me. I roll my eyes at his audacity and continue to do my work, trying my best to ignore him. But he keeps looking my way. I look up at him again, and he has a look on his face that makes me think he's asked me something, which I didn't hear due to my headphones. Whoops.

I ask him to repeat what he said, after removing the headphones, and he gets all upset, like the fact that he's all up in my space, interrupting me from my work and my music is MY problem, and repeats himself. It's a dumb question that doesn't deserve an answer. But I answer it anyways. And he asks me another dumb question. Which I don't answer, because it's not worth my time. I just shrug my shoulders, but my music back on, and tell him that I really have a lot of work to do.

Sidebar: I hate when people ask me questions that I don't know the answer to. It's ok if they ask me one, but to ask me again and again is just frustrating for all of us. For example, "what is the air speed velocity of an unladed swallow?" "Umm, I don't know." "Well, do you know how fast he'd fly if he were carrying two coconut husks?" "Uhhh, that's gonna be a 'no'." "What about if he were carrying only..." You get my point. It's aggrivating, so don't do it.

Slowly, over the course of the morning, more and more people come into the lab. But none of them sit next to Mr. Taking-Up-All-The-Room. Because he's taking up all the room. I finally finish and start to pack my stuff up. In the process, I bump into a few of his things. He goes, "oh, sorry, are my things in your way?". "No, not anymore." "Because I can move them if they're in the way. Here, let me...." and he proceeds to make a scene ruffling his papers and groaning about it. I continue to tell him not to worry about it, and he continues to speak. I put my headphones back on, and he continues to speak. As I'm walking out of the room, he's still speaking. To me. Who is no longer there.

Which makes me wonder what he's like as a teacher. And makes me thankful for headphones.

I'm back!

2009-01-09T10:47:00.002-05:00

It's been....three months....since my last post, but I'm working on new stories and they'll be up and going very soon! So, be on the look out

'Tis the Season....for mice

2008-10-30T23:31:00.013-04:00

Gallaudet, Sept 2004

I'm sitting on my bed, alone in the room, reading, when I see something out of the corner of my eye. I put my book down to look: nothing. I pick up the book to read again, and I see something, I don't know what, but something, again! It's not clear, but it's movement, and I only see it out of the corner of my eye. I think, for a split second, that I'm going crazy. So, I put the book down and sit very quietly, just looking.Then I see it. A mouse, with a pretzel as big as its head in its mouth, and it's just walking through the middle of my room. When I see it, naturally, I scream. The mouse drops the pretzel and runs into my closet. "Brilliant", I think. "It's going to hide in my shoe, and tomorrow morning I'm going to stick my toes in my sneaker only to have them meet something warm and fuzzy inside."

I scrambled down to the RA's office, and quickly explain my emergency. She hands me a glue trap and says good night. The idea is repulsive: I'd rather touch a mouse that's hiding in my shoe with my toes than see it, alive, stuck to the trap, writhing in fear. Nonetheless, I head back up to my room and place the trap on the floor next to my closet.

When my roommates come home, they see me, crouched on my dresser, afraid to set foot on the floor. I tell them what happened, and explain that the mouse has to come out eventually. I even leave its pretzel on the floor, to tempt it back out to retrieve it. My roommates think this is funny and take a picture of me on the dresser.

But, lo and behold, a few minutes later, I see the mouse. And I get a picture of it!

It runs out of the room, misses the trap, and is never seen again. However, we did catch a fly on the trap. It landed with all six legs right in the glue. It must have tried very hard to get itself off the trap because the next day, all six legs were still stuck in the glue, but its body was over an inch away, legless

Fish Blog 2

2008-10-30T17:04:00.003-04:00

...The fish tank looks great, but the puddle of water surrounding it concerns me. I immediately thought, “is it leaking?” There wasn’t enough water on the desk to suggest that, and the water level in the tank was still high. It was while I was inspecting the soggy desk top that I noticed the little snail I had in the tank was now scooting along the surface of my desk. I stiffened instantly. Oh my God, I thought, they got out. And yes, after a closer look in the tank, I saw that one of my fish was…missing. Close to panicking, I plucked the snail from my desk and plopped him back in the water. I stood motionless, afraid that even turning my head would cause me to lose balance, therefore cause me to need to move me feet, and to surely step on the missing fish. After a minute, I leapt from my position and landed near by bed. There’s no way the fish could have gotten this far, I figured. I walked over to Julie’s door and knocked. She came in, and said the fish were great and that there had been no problems. When I asked her about the water…and snail…on the desk, she insisted that all had been well that afternoon when she fed the fish, and that she had no idea what happened, either. I told her that one of the fish was missing. She must have seen the fear in my eyes because she assured me that she’d look for it, and find it.

We scoured my room. We looked everywhere that could possibly contain a two-inch long fish. But it was nowhere. Julie finally gave up and said, “I’m sure we’ll smell it sooner or later” and left me to unpack from my trip. “We’ll smell it?” I thought to myself and almost passed out. I continued to look all through the night. I was terrified of finding it, but even more scared of not finding it. Where could it have gone?

Slowly, the idea of a rotting fish fouling up my room escaped my mind, and I was able to move on with my life. The tank, also thoroughly cleaned, had not produced a dead fish either. It was easier for me to think that God himself had come down and brought my fish up to Heaven directly than it was for me to imagine it…somewhere…in my room. But after about a week, there was still no sign. Two weeks passed, and nothing.

It was time to clean out the tank again, and as I started changing the water, I noticed a horrific smell. Oh my goodness. I emptied the tank completely, scrubbed it and everything, and the smell persisted. The fish was here, I knew it, but there was nothing in the tank! I called Julie in, and she recoiled at the smell. But, even she couldn’t see a dead fish anywhere. Out of desperation, I decided to dismantle the tank. It was a small tank, hexagon in shape. At each seam, the glass sides were held together with a hard piece of black rubber. I pulled and pushed on the tank, and was able to free one side of the tank from the rubber. I had half the tank taken apart when it happened. I pulled one side of the tank out of the rubber, and the fish popped out. After being dead, submerged, for almost three weeks. It not only reeked, it was green, bloated and had funny stuff growing all over it. I screamed.

The fish, who had somehow (although I still don’t see how it was physically possible) wedged itself into the rubber, completely out of view. As I pulled the glass free, the deformed, bloated fish carcass went flying. Thankfully it landed somewhere near the toilet, and as I started to get dizzy and almost pass out, Julie proclaimed that she had already flushed the fish. It was safe. I still didn’t move until my vision was clear, and I was able to see for myself that there were no longer any fish on the floor.

Now, anybody who knows what’s good for them would have continued to take the tank apart, bid it farewell, and pack it away in some dark corner never to be seen again. But that’s not me. I, for some reason, decided to give it another go. Fish just don’t keep jumping out at people, I had to reassure myself, and surely I could handle taking care of some more. Because I really like fish, I do. Just not when they’re dead. So, I bought more. All was well until I took the tank home to my parents for the summer. I forget how I managed that logistic feat, but I clearly remember what happened once I was home. I woke up one morning and checked on the tank….and one of the fish was gone. “For Pete’s sake!”, I said to myself (note, that’s the censored version of what I said to myself). I froze, and looked down. Not more than two inches from my foot lay the dead, now fuzzy body of my fish. I freaked out. I screamed. And I picked up the phone and called my mom at work. The fish’s body was now fuzzy and dry from being out all night. My mom, when she picked up the phone, must have heard the panic in my voice, and asked me what was wrong. The following came out very quickly, “the fish, it jumped out, it’s on the floor, and it’s fuzzy. I almost stepped on it. Can you come home and pick it up?” At first she said nothing. Then she giggled. Ever so slightly at first, then the giggle became a real laugh. “No honey, I can’t come home and pick it up right now, but I will, on my lunch break. Why not put a box or something over the fish, so you don’t have to look at it. And so the dog doesn’t eat it.” I suppressed my reflex to gag. “So the dog doesn’t eat it”? I swallowed, hard, and told her that I would do that, and asked her to hurry.

Crazy Mind Reading Ball

2008-10-28T23:22:00.002-04:00

I just spent the last several hours playing with one of these: they're so freaky! You think of something, anything really, and the ball will ask you questions (they scroll by on a marquee-like screen) and you answer YES, NO, SOMETIMES or UNKNOWN. I didn't believe it until it guessed Ismael's word "samurai sword". Other words it guessed right:

a tear

broccoli

pacifier

music

earwax

fireplace

fingernail

I have no idea how it does it, but it's amazing. It totally reads your mind!!!!

Fish Blog I

2008-10-27T00:05:00.002-04:00

Death in general isn’t pleasant, but dead fish are particularly disgusting. And fish die often. Everything about dead fish is nasty, and I have a theory as to why I think they’re so repulsive: I have a vague memory as a child, standing in front of a large fish tank we used to have in our house. I was about six, standing there, looking at the fish tank one afternoon wondering where all the fish had gone. I knew they couldn’t just get up and walk away. I called my mom over, and she, too, was mystified by the seeming lack of fish in the tank. She also noticed that the filter’s motor had malfunctioned, and was creating a great deal of heat. Unbeknownst to us, the fish, not wanting to be boiled alive, actually jumped out of the tank and were all dead at our feet. But we hadn’t seen this yet. So there we were, both looking intently at the glass, wondering where they fish had gone. I was not wearing any shoes, and as I shifted my balance to get a better look in the tank, I felt a squish under my foot. I looked down in horror to then see them: the fish. All over the floor. And one, completely crushed, under my foot. I screamed. My mom screamed. I had to wipe fish guts off of my toes.

Having the sensory memory of the fish exploding under my foot only adds to my fear of dead fish. And because of this, I often approach fish in a cautious manner: half expecting them to jump on me, or half expecting them to instantly die and induce in me an instant gag reflex. It takes some time before I am able to trust them and see them for the beautiful creatures they are. So I’m not sure what about my fear of dead fish actually prompted me to, in college, have fish.

I was given a fish tank by a friend for my birthday, after hinting shamelessly about wanting one. He gave me the tank with all the fixings, including four orange mollies. However, when he presented the tank to me, we could only find three fish. Had I not known there were originally four, I would not have had reason to be concerned. But after his insisting that the fourth fish was either stolen or involved in some sort of fish-rapture, I couldn’t help but become incredibly paranoid. It jumped out. I knew it. I’m going to step on it. I made everyone search the floor for the missing fish. It was nowhere. We laughed it off, assuming that only three fish were originally purchased, not four, and that my friend had been mistaken. But I was paranoid for several weeks, thinking about the dead fish turning up in my dorm room.

Fast forward two years to my senior year in college. I still have the fish tank, and although the fish now living in it are different than the originals, I have done ok with them. I have managed to kill only a few, and have lucked out with fantastic roommates who disposed of the dead fish for me. Well, this weekend in particular, I was planning on going to Virginia Beach for a friend’s wedding, and needed someone to come and feed my fish for me. I asked my former roommate and then current neighbor, Julie, and she gladly agreed. I took off for Virginia Beach, and the weekend turned out to be the weekend from hell (which is another story entirely). Once I finally got back to the dorm Sunday night, I walked in to find a strange sight on my desk......

Funny Feet!

2008-10-21T08:34:00.004-04:00

So, my friend Joseph came into my office a while back with these on his feet...

They're shoes, but they look like those toe socks! I thought they were the weirdest, and the coolest thing ever. For people who like to go barefoot but don't want to get all dirty!

Helpful

2008-10-07T15:59:00.004-04:00

So, today I was walking down a hallway at Gallaudet, when I heard a loud banging. I mean, like a super-loud pounding coming from the other side of the wall. While I was a little shocked, hearing this type of thing at Gallaudet isn't exactly out of the ordingary, and I decided to just keep walking by (one learns to tune out noises like this on campus....)

Well, I only made it a few more feet down the hallway when I heard a woman yell from the same direction the bang was coming from. She yelled "HELP ME! IF YOU CAN HEAR ME, HELP ME!" I immediately stopped, turned around, and ran back to where her voice, and the loud bang, were coming from.

I ended up at a door, which was cracked open about three inches. I started to peer in, but at the same time, a woman peered out. She said something to the effect of, "wow! I'm so glad someone finally heard me! I'm stuck in this closet, I can't get out!" I couldn't help but wonder how long this poor woman had been stuck, and of all the people that must have walked by here without hearing a thing. She explained that somehow a very large brick was stuck behind the door (I didn't really understand what she meant, and I couldn't see it), but she said it was blocking the door and that's why she couldn't get out. Sure enough, I tried to push on the door, and it didn't budge. I even threw my whole body weight against the thing, and it moved like 1/4 inch.

Talking through the small opening, she asked if I could see anyone else, someone who might have a little more bulk, and who could muscle the door open. Just as she asked that, a large man came walking by. He was about 6'3" and at least 250 pounds. I explained what was going on, and he said he'd gladly try and open the door. With a couple pushes, and a lot of muscle, he got the door open, and the poor woman freed.

A similar story happened last semester at Dawes House, the old home of the Linguistics Department. Dawes House is over 100 years old, and therefore comes with some quirks that only accompany and old building. One day, a professor of mine walked into the bathroom and closed the door. But as the door closed, the door knob fell off. Without the knob she was no longer able to open it, and was therefore stuck. I walked into Dawes House sometime later, saw the bathroom door shut and the door knob laying on the floor. At the same time, I heard this professor yelling for help. I was able to get the knob back into the door long enough to open it and free her.

While no one likes to get stuck in a room, you really don't want to get stuck in a room at Gallaudet. You never know how long it will take before someone walks by and hears you!

Linguistics Humor

2008-10-02T19:05:00.005-04:00

Careful, don't laugh too hard!!!

fent (singular), fents (plural), fentsing? (plural progressive)

Chee (singular), chees (plural), chees-y?

So, "the" walks into a bar w/ his friend "a". They sit down and order some drinks. A asks, "so, what are you up to these days? Still marking NPs [noun phrases]?" The nods and takes a drink, "definitely."

More phemes = morphemes?

My Time

2008-09-26T17:09:00.003-04:00

Do you ever get to the end of the week just to see your room still needs cleaning, the car still needs vacuuming, and the pile of papers to go through is still on your desk? It's at that moment that I sit and ask myself, "wow, what did I accomplish this week?" So, as part of a "social experiment" (where by "social" I mean myself), I recorded what I did, when I did it, and for how long I did it, everyday, for two weeks. Check it out, it's pretty surprising (time indicated is the average time spent on activity for EACH day)

Top 5 most time consuming activities of the WEEKDAY:

Sleeping (6 hours, 52 mins)
Hanging Out* (2 hours, 40 mins)
Driving (2 hours, 30 mins)
Teaching Preparation (2 hours, 26 mins)
Teaching (2 hours, 13 mins)

Top 5 most time consuming activities of the WEEKEND:

Sleeping (8 hours, 41 mins)
Church Events (3 hours, 11 mins)
Driving (2 hours, 56 mins)
Teaching Preparation (2 hours, 52 mins)
Hanging Out* (1 hour, 45 mins)

*Hanging Out: watching TV, movies, eating, chatting, doing nothing

I was very surprised about how much time I spend in the car everyday! And, one of the activities that I feel like I'm always doing, homework, didn't even make the top 5 list. Hmm, interesting...Not surprising? Cleaning is very low on the list...

Musings...

2008-09-25T13:30:00.003-04:00

This blog isn't so much funny, but something that I have been thinking about....

There is this hallway at Gallaudet that has a set of double doors at each end. Now, both doors are equipped with those "handicapped" buttons. You know, the kind that you push and the door opens by itself? Well, the first time I walked through that hallway and approached the first set of doors, I noticed the powerful buzzing sound that came from them. Curious, but not inspired to do anything about it, I attempted to do open the door manually. And to my surprise, it was quite difficult! Not only was the door heavy, but I seemed to be pulling AGAINST the machinery of the automatic-open button. After grunting, and nearly dropping my books as the door attacked me, I finally made it through.

The next set of doors stood at the other end of the hallway. There was no buzzing sound coming from these doors. I felt somewhat more comfortable with them, and again, tried to open them manually. And lo and behold, it worked beautifully, and the doors swung open with hardly any effort at all.

I was thinking about this the next day when I walked through the doors. As I approaced the buzzing doors, I thought twice about pulling them open. I figured that the buzzing was the sound of the auto-open button, and decided to see what happened when I pressed it. So I did. And, wow, the doors opened quickly, smoothly, and with much less hassle than me prying them open. I arrived at the second set of doors, and again, noticed no buzzing. But with my recent success, I was now curious about the auto-open button, and tried it on these doors, too. To my surprise the doors opened very slowly (I mean, like I could have gone and gotten a coffee, gotten back, finished the coffee and had time to throw the cup away by the time they opened).

So what's the point of all this? It got me thinking about potential, and the way that we are designed to succeed. Some people are "buzzing" with one kind of potential. It's obvious, you can hear it, see it, feel it. To get these people to turn on, you've just got to hit the right button and off they go! But other people seem to not "buzz". When you push their buttons, you only succeed in frustrating them, and yourself. The job gets done, but much slower and with more work than either party had intended. So, sadly, we often think that those people who don't buzz are somehow lacking in potential. But I think it's important to remember that just because they don't buzz with one kind of potential, doesn't mean they aren't built to work another way.

When you encounter a person who, after hitting all their buttons, still doesn't respond, don't give up on them. Just try reaching out, grabbing the doorknob, and pulling. You might be surprised with the result.

The Great Flood - Part II

2008-09-17T23:40:00.003-04:00

I ran, still with the faucet in hand, down to the RA’s room, hoping she could do something (but knowing she probably couldn’t). I got to her room and banged on the door like someone was dying. Her boyfriend finally opened the door with an annoyed expression (*gulp* on my part…), I said something like, “ohhh, sorry for interrupting, but my room is flooding.” He was like, “…and?...” I asked for the RA, and she reluctantly met me at the door. I tried to indicate the seriousness of the situation, but they weren’t quite getting it. Finally, they both came back up to my room with me. The first indication of a problem was the wet hallway. Then, the RA and her boyfriend finally realized this was actually serious. He opened the door, and the water came pouring out. There was about two inches of standing water in my room! And it was HOT (I mean, steam coming off the top and everything!). The boyfriend ran in and opened the bathroom door, all the while braving the temperature. He reached under the sink for the emergency shut off valve (which I think I tried, too, earlier) but it was rusted so badly it wouldn’t budge. He was pulling and grunting, while the RA and I were trying to do something about the fact that all my stuff was getting wet. Finally, the boyfriend managed to pry the valve shut, and the water miraculously stopped gushing. We all stood in disbelief, and in two inches of hot water, for a few minutes. We then grabbed whatever we could to begin bailing out. I recruited a friend, and told her to bring all of her Tupperware. The four of us - me, the RA, her boyfriend, and my friend – bailed out water all night, it seemed. When it was finally dry enough, they left and I collapsed. I also called campus police and asked them to ask a plumber to come out and fix the problem. But, to my (not so much so) surprise, plumbers in North Carolina don’t seem to work on weekends.

Monday finally came along, and after a long weekend of not having water in our bathroom (due to the college’s brilliant idea of shutting off the entire water supply to our bathroom until the plumber came), we were more than ready for a plumber. The other three rooms adjacent to the bathroom had not only had to endure a weekend of using other people’s showers and toilets, they, too, were cleaning up the mess in their rooms left by my little flood. Finally Monday came, and finally someone arrived outside my door knocking. I eagerly answered it, ready for it to be the plumber, but was greeted instead with an electrician. He said something to the effect of, “I hear you’ve got an electric problem here”. Um….no, we’ve got a water problem. I explained this to him, and he ended up saying, “Well, electricity and water don’t really mix all that well, so, I guess you won’t be needing my help after all. And then he left. It wasn’t until a series of phone calls later that a plumber finally made it to our bathroom to fix the sink, and consequently turn on the water. A week later. And with some smart-alecky, “careful there, Popeye…this here’s a brand new faucet…lay off the spinach for a while, would you?” comment.

The Great Flood - Part I

2008-09-16T23:20:00.002-04:00

One Friday night, in my senior year of college (2003), I went out to see a play starring one of my friends. For some reason, I didn’t eat before I went out, and was quite hungry throughout the whole performance. When it was through, I went home – back to the dorm – to make myself some dinner. So, that night, I got back, and due to my lack of culinary skills and the complete lack of kitchen equipment allowed in the dorms, I proceeded to cook one of the only things possible: Easy Mac.

Now, that year was the only year (out of the six living in a dorm) that I had a room to myself. The rooms were set up in such a way that four rooms shared one bathroom. Imagine a flower. The bathroom was the yellow center of the flower, and the rooms were each petals. That’s kinda what it looked like. Each room had a door that opened up into a different part of the bathroom - mine opened directly in front of the sink.

So, I opened the door leading to the bathroom, and commenced the Easy Mac making process. I, as I had a large number of times before, turned the hot water knob on the sink to fill up my bowl. However, this time, instead of the water coming out of the faucet, the faucet came off in my hand! Hot water shot straight out, right into my stomach (because I was standing right in front of it). I jumped back – it was already really hot – and then proceeded to panic (which amounted to me standing there dumbly for a few seconds trying to figure out how to make it stop). I fruitlessly tried to jam the faucet back on the gaping hole in the sink, but the pressure of the water gushing out was so high that there was no chance of repair while the water was running. Not to mention the water temperature was like 100 degrees. I took a minute to panic some more, and then realized that the steady gush of water was, in fact, shooting directly into my room because the door was still open. My room was flooding quickly! I closed the door, and ran out of the bathroom into my sopping room. Water was still leaking (that’s not really the right word, because leaking implies something small….this wasn’t) out from under the door. And it was really hot.

So what did I do? Tune in to find out :)

Revisiting a Funny Conversation

2008-09-15T19:03:00.002-04:00

So I was at a store in Northern Virginia a couple months ago. Here is the actual conversation that took place while I was checking out with my purchases. Now, this cashier is a girl about my age. She doesn't have an accent like she's from another country or even from another part of this country. However, she was seemingly from another planet:

Cashier: Hi, can I get your address so I can send you some coupons?

Me: Sure. It's .....11th St NE...

Cashier: What street?

Me: 11th Street. E-lev-enth Street.

Cashier: E-what?

Me: Eleventh, as in the number. Just put a one, then another one, then a "th"

Cashier: that's it?

Me: Well, yeah, then put "street" and "North East"

Cashier: (in a tone indicating she doesn't believe me) Umm.....ok.....

Me: and that's Washington, DC

Cashier: So that's in Maryland, right?

Me: (blank, confused stare)

Cashier: (blank, confused stare)

Me: Umm, Maryland?

Cashier: Yeah, Washington, DC? That's in Maryland, right?

Me: No, it's in...WASHINGTON, DC

Cashier: (again, with a tone indicating she doesn't believe me) So, yeah....what should I put down for your state, then?

Me: DC!

Cashier: So it's its own thing...like a state?

Me: Yes, it's its own thing...like a DISTRICT.

Cashier: Really? Ok, so, now, your zip code?

I guess I just figured that most people knew DC wasn't a city in Maryland! Now, if she had just moved to the area from another country, or even from another state not familiar with the whole District thing, well that's one thing. But if she's been around long enough to land a job, she's been around long enough to know. DC is not a city in Maryland. I ended up making it out of the store without laughing in her face, but got a 20 minute chuckle out of it on the way home.

Chemistry Lesson, Part II

2008-09-14T08:58:00.003-04:00

I ran through the bathroom to my neighbor’s room. I knocked, she answered, and I asked her if she smelled it. She didn’t, so I led her into my room and asked her to smell again. She did, and retched. It was that nasty. She ran back into her room, and I ran out of my room into the hallway. Our dorm was set up more like a motel than a traditional dorm, which meant the “hallway” was actually an outside breezeway connecting the rooms. Instinct told me to run outside to get some fresh air. But amazingly, the smell outside was WORSE! Another neighbor was out there, too, with burning, watering eyes and a strangely hoarse cough. She saw me and said, “umm, I think we’re all going to have to leave, it’s really bad in my room.” I asked her what the heck was going on, and she didn’t know. I called campus police (we were buddies by now, practically), and told them of the problem. They evacuated the building, and told us all to come back in several hours.

With a little research, and asking the right questions to the right people, I was able to piece it together. The girls in the room next to me had a problem with their shower drain (we didn’t share a bathroom, but her bedroom was right next to mine), and called campus maintenance. They couldn’t be bothered to fix a clogged drain, so they instructed my neighbor to pour an ENTIRE BOTTLE of bleach down the drain. That should fix the problem. When it didn’t, she called back and ended up speaking to a different person. This new person told her that a much more effective remedy was ammonia, and instructed her to pour an ENTIRE bottle of that down the shower drain, too. The problem would be fixed in no time.

Do you remember middle school chemistry? When we learned about acids and bases? Bleach and ammonia are evidently opposites chemically (I forget which is the acid, which is the base, but it really doesn’t matter). The point is that when they are mixed, a nasty chemical reaction takes place. In this case, the result was the spewing of noxious fumes all throughout the dorm.

We weren’t allowed to come back all day. But, by nightfall, they had everything sufficiently aired out and we were allowed to sleep in our own beds. Campus maintenance tried to make it up to us. They fixed every conceivable problem, from a flickering light bulb to the outlet that mysteriously sparked. They even thought it would be extra special to paint our dorm room doors, to liven the place up a little. I thought it was a great idea, too, at first. That was until someone pained the door, and the door frame, then shut the door while both were still wet. I had to call campus police to have them come break my door down (literally), because, in my own words to the police, “some genius painted it shut”.

Thanks, guys! But, next time…don’t. Really.

Yearbook Yourself!

2008-09-13T13:21:00.006-04:00

Ever wonder what you'd look like with an afro from 1978? Or how you'd look if you relived 1996?

Or what about what you'd look like sporting some nifty cat glasses from 1964? Or with totally rad hair from 1994?

Or what would you look like when when whispy was in 1992? Or with a spify do from 1962?

Or maybe with a more matronly look from 1958? Or a rockin' puff do from 1984?

What about a sweet polka dot shirt from 1976? Or with a scary curly do from 1986?

Finally, if you want to go way back, ever wonder what you'd look like as a trendy teen in 1952?

Wonder no more! Check out www.yearbookyourself.com!

Chemistry Lesson: Part I

2008-09-11T10:12:00.004-04:00

On morning in college (spring of ’03?), I woke up on a Saturday way too early. In college I was a good sleeper (I still am, but back then I was especially good), and didn’t ever wake up earlier than necessary. But this morning, there I was, at some un-Godly hour (ok, that’s what it seemed like…it was probably only 8:00 or something) awake, for some unforeseen reason. I quickly surveyed the possible explanations in my head:

I heard something weird (ok, I was - and am - a good sleeper, but a painfully light sleeper)
I dreamt something weird
Someone was in my room, watching me (which relates to the light sleeping thing: you look at me when I’m sleeping, I wake up. It’s my claim to sixth-sense fame)

But alas, none of these reasons made sense. I listened, but didn’t hear anything. I thought, but didn’t remember my dreams. I looked, but was blissfully alone. Then I took a deep breath. BLECH! That was it! I woke up smelling something fiercely nasty!

I jumped out of bed and ran to the bathroom, expecting to find some kind of disaster. But, amazingly, the smell was less noticeable in the bathroom. I ran back into my room….BLECH, what IS that? I was convinced that some rabid animal had snuck into my room in the night and defecated. I searched everywhere – my eyes watering at this point – but found nothing. With horror I thought, maybe I was the one who defecated??? I ran to my bed, and with a great sigh of relief, found that not to be true. But what was it then? My eyes were starting to burn a little.

But amazingly, the smell outside was WORSE! Another neighbor was out there, too, with burning, watering eyes and a strangely hoarse cough. She saw me and said, “umm, I think we’re all going to have to leave, it’s really bad in my room.” I asked her what the heck was going on, and she didn’t know. I called campus police (we were buddies by now, practically), and told them of the problem. They evacuated the building, and told us all to come back in several hours.

And then....well....tune in later to hear Part II!

Awkward Conversation

2008-09-10T23:27:00.005-04:00

Actual conversation: 9/10/08

Scene: It’s 1:50ish, and I’ve just finished teaching my ASL I (American Sign Language) class and am packing my things. One student has a question which I’m currently answering. We’re not talking (due to my no-talking rule), but signing. In walks the socially awkward, slightly doughy, overly greasy, middle-aged English Lit adjunct professor who uses the same room at 2:00.

Me: finishes teaching ASL class, packs things, tries (unsuccessfully) to leave without talking to the man entering the room

Mr. Awkward: Hi, I finally figured out what’s going on here. You’re doing ALS.

Me: (internal dialog: ALS? Lou Gehrig’s disease? No…but not worth explaining…just go with it) Ummm...

Mr. Awkward: I have a special respect for you people. I used to work as an engineer at a facility just down the road, a mental institution for retarded people. It’s special work that you guys do.

Me: (internal dialog: Retarded people? Exactly what does that have to do with ASL? Ohh…he thinks deaf people are retarded…umm…okaaaay) Oh, really?

Mr. Awkward: Yeah, and we even made sure to order special plates and silverware. Adaptive stuff, you know. So that the residents could use them. Some people were really messed up. They couldn’t even hold a fork. We made sure they had forks they COULD hold. They called the place a “school”, can you believe that?

Me: Why, yes I can. I’m pretty sure they were teaching the residents quite a bit.

Mr. Awkward: I mean, they even called themselves “teachers”, can you believe it? Like they were [draws quotes in air] “learning”

Me: (internal dialog: can I punch you in the face? Say as little as possible and run away as fast as possible) Oh

Mr. Awkward: So, yeah, lots of respect for you people. Maybe you could come give a presentation to my class! It’d be great! You could talk about retarded people!

Me: (internal dialog: run, run, run! For the love of God, run!) Umm, what class do you teach?

Mr. Awkward: English Lit

Me: (internal dialog: ASL teacher talking about mental institution residents in an English Lit class? WHAT?!?!?!) Oh, um….I’ve got to go

Mr. Awkward: reaches out to shake my hand My name’s Bob*, by the way.

Me: reaches to take his hand Hi Bob, Katie

Mr. Awkward: pinches the very end of my fingers, as if afraid to clasp my hand, and shakes Nice to meet you. And get back to me about the class, that’d be great

Me: ummm….runs like mess

*you guessed it: his name’s not really Bob